Marshall Quote #712

Quote from Marshall in Subway Wars

Future Ted: [v.o.] Kids, I should tell you, Lily really needed a win that day.
[title: "Why Lily Needed A Win":]
Future Ted: When Marshall and Lily decided to have a baby, they assumed it would happen right away.
Marshall: It's gonna be positive. Eriksen man are hella fertile. When Uncle Morris was 16, he got his girlfriend pregnant just by holding her hand too tight in the backseat of a car. Now I'm thinking my parents lied to me.


 ‘Subway Wars’ Quotes

Quote from Marshall

Marshall: [inner monologue] I'll show them. My body can outrun any motorized vehicle. I'm like John Henry when he beat the steam engine. All I need is a great folk song.
Marshall: [singing] Gather round, ye children To hear the tale so sweet Of a man who dared to race machines With nothing but his feet
Marshall: Suck it, grand-butt!
Marshall: [singing] Marshall Versus the machines Hyah!

Quote from Lily

Conductor: [indistinct talk over muffled P.A.]
Lily: Track maintenance?
Conductor: [indistinct talk over muffled P.A.]
Lily: 20-minute delay?
Man: How do you do that?
Lily: I grew up here, I speak conductor. Damn it!
[Lily exits the train. The doors then close and the train starts moving.]
Lily: Damn it!

Quote from Barney

Barney: I cannot stop staring at that girl's face.
Ted: Face. Huh. That's your weirdest nickname for boobs yet.
Barney: No, Ted, I'm really looking at her face.
Lily: Aw... That's actually really sweet.
Barney: Puffy cheeks, smudged mascara, slightly red nose... That girl was just crying. She's so sad and defenseless. Anyone have a condom?
All: Oh! Oh, God! No, no, no!
Lily: That's it! You know what? Five-minute time-out! Corner booth! Now.