Lily Quote #329

Quote from Lily in Sorry, Bro

Lily: Ted, Marshall forgot to bring his pants to work today and you're still the stupidest person at this table.
Ted: Okay, Lily, let's be honest. We both know your real motivation here, you hate Karen, because, she lingered.
Lily: You son of a bitch!
Robin: What do you mean, she lingered?
Lily: February 5, 1998. I was painting.
[flashback to Lily painting a picture of a nude Marshall:]
Karen: [enters] Sorry, I... [slowly backs out] Sorry... I... [returns] You know, that color palette is a bit derivative of early Van Gogh, don't you think?
[present:]
Lily: Cheat on Ted, criticize my painting, whatever that's your business. But I catch you, peeping on my man's junk, and you linger! You gots to get got!

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 ‘Sorry, Bro’ Quotes

Quote from Barney

Barney: Ted, sure it's fun to look back at a time when you were a fresh-faced farm girl with a virgin's glow. But all that stuff, Ohio, Karen, college? All that was B.S. Before Stinson. Now, your life is awesome! I mean, yeah, you still live with your ex-girlfriend which is ridiculous. Your Laser Tag chops are almost nonexistent. And your wardrobe! It's like, what? Are you allergic to quality fabrics? Seriously Ted, shape up! What were we talking about?

Quote from Marshall

Ted: So Karen in New York, weird, right?
Lily: Ted, you cannot get back together with Karen.
Ted: I never said I was going to get back together with her. But I was thinking she's new in town, would it be the worst thing in the world if I gave her a call?
Marshall: No, Ted. It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world, it would be the fourth worst thing. Number 1, super volcano. Number 2, an asteroid hits the Earth. Number 3, all footage of Evel Knievel is lost. Number 4, Ted calls Karen. Number 5, Lily gets eaten by a shark.
Lily: I'm Lily and I approve the order of that list.

Quote from Robin

Robin: Wait. This happen in our apartment? Where was I?
Ted: You know, those sleeping pills you're taking to keep on your crazy new schedule? I think they're stronger than you realize.
[flashback to Ted and Karen moving from the couch to his bedroom in the apartment. They pass Robin, who is passed out at the desk:]
Robin: [talking in her sleep] La Fontaine gets the puck to Turgeon. Turgeon shoots. Glove save!