Future Ted Quote #110
Quote from Future Ted in Benefits
Future Ted: [v.o.] So Robin and I went back to just being roommates and things went back to normal. Your Aunt Lily was right. When two exes decide to just be casual, someone always gets hurt. It just wasn't one of us.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Benefits’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Ted: Oh, like Barney's theory about world peace?
[flashback to Barney talking to Ted at MacLaren's:]
Barney: So I explained to her. I said, Madeline, every single international conflict essentially boils down to sexual tension.
Ted: Every international conflict?
Barney: Every single one, dude.
Ted: So the crisis in the Middle East could be solved by...
Barney: Gaza Strippers. Next.
Ted: Apartheid?
Barney: Apart thighs. What else you got?
Ted: Cold War?
Barney: "Mrs. Gorbachev, take down those pants."
Quote from Barney
Ted: Sorry I'm late. I was just jammin' on Scherbatsky. She used up all my stamps, so long story short, the postman rang twice. You must bump this!
Barney: That's... just... so... Excuse me for a second.
[later, Barney finds the dumpster behind MacLaren's is empty. He goes to an electronics store]
Barney: So, you're saying plasmas are better for low light, but LCDs are better for games?
Clerk: Right, but the CRTs have the truest blacks.
Barney: So, if I want a really crisp contrast ratio...
Clerk: The CRT's deep-pixel cell structure produces a resolution you just can't match with an LCD.
Barney: Oh, I'll take the CRT.
[later, Barney smashes the TV in the alley behind MacLaren's]
Quote from Barney
Marshall: Nobody likes to read a magazine at work and if they say that they do, then they're not human.
Barney: Dude, I read a magazine at work every day. I can't tell you how many meetings I've been late to because I was busy "reading a magazine." But I don't feel bad about it. That's my time. Sure, "reading a magazine" ain't pretty, but, you know, it's something I gotta do. So why be ashamed about it? Wait, "reading a magazine" means masturbating, right?