Ted Quote #377
Quote from Ted in The Platinum Rule
Future Ted: [v.o.] Kids, too often in life, we make decisions that we're not prepared to live with. This is a story about those decisions, and the consequences that follow.
Ted: Say goodbye, kids, 'cause it won't be around much longer.
Lily: Oh, but Ted, if you get rid of the butterfly, how's everyone gonna know you're a stripper from Reno with daddy issues?
Ted: Yes, yes, enjoy these final moments of mockery because in just ten surprisingly expensive sessions, Stella is gonna zap that butterfly right off the face of my lower back.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘The Platinum Rule’ Quotes
Quote from Ted
Lily: Michael and Laura. They're awesome. We're gonna invite them over for dinner.
Ted: Oh no, no, guys, guys! Are you insane?
Ted: This is New York City. You don't get close to the neighbors. You nod at them politely in the hall. You call the cops if you haven't seen them in a while and you smell something funny, and that is it.
Quote from Ted
Barney: Ted, have you not been listening? Attraction, bargaining, submission, perks, tipping point, purgatory, confrontation, fallout! These things will all happen to you as surely as they happened to all of us! It's a rule of nature.
Ted: Well, I'm sick of all the rules! There's too many of them! The hot/crazy scale, the lemon law, the platinum rule! If everyone in the world followed every one of your rules, the human race would cease to exist. Yes, chances are to Stella and I are not going to live happily ever after. The overwhelming odds have it ending badly. And when that happens, it'll be for one of a million possible reasons. But that doesn't mean I'm not gonna try. And when it does fail, so help me God, it's not gonna be because of some rule. [looks in the mirror] P.S., you just made my hair look awesome. Good night.
Quote from Barney
Barney: Ted, you've heard of the golden rule, right? "Love thy neighbor?"
Ted: Uh, actually, it's "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." It's from the bible.
Barney: Damn it, Ted, I've worked out this whole thing where the golden rule is "love thy neighbor", okay? Now the golden rule is "Love thy neighbor". But, there's one rule above it: the platinum rule: "never ever, ever, ever, love thy neighbor."