Barney Quote #467
Quote from Barney in Third Wheel
Barney: [on the phone] All right, Ted, if you're about to go for the belt, then the bylaws require me to ask the following questions. One, is the aggregate age of all the participants under 83?
Ted: Yes.
Barney: Two, is the aggregate weight of all participants under 400 pounds.
Ted: Yes.
Barney: Theodore Mosby, are you paying these women?
Ted: What? No.
Barney: Ted?
Ted: No. Look, I gotta go. They're gonna think I inherited my dad's imaginary bathroom issues.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Third Wheel’ Quotes
Quote from Marshall
[Flashback to less than half an hour ago, as Barney and Marshall play Wii Sports in the apartment:]
Marshall: Yes, advantage Eriksen.
Barney: Don't get cocky. Wimbledon lasts a fortnight.
Marshall: Fortnight. British words are so cool. Plus, did you know lawyers there get to wear wigs? I wear a wig to work, I'm a jackass.
Quote from Barney
Ted: All right, I'm ready, let's hit it.
Marshall: Can't go. Tournament.
Ted: What? We agreed, I suited up.
Barney: You take too long to get ready.
Ted: What are you talking about? I got the low-maintenance, just-rolled-out-of-bed look.
Marshall: Yeah, which takes an hour and a half of waxing, tugging and teasing to achieve.
Barney: And then he starts on his hair. Ace.
Quote from Marshall
Barney: [answering phone] Stinson.
Ted: All right, the beers are here.
Barney: Yeah, we're not gonna make it.
Ted: Oh come on, we agreed. Did Marshall take his pants off?
Barney: Yeah, pants are off.
Marshall: This is Wimbledon, Ted. I need the freedom and mobility that only underwear can provide. Cheerio.