Ted Quote #264
[Robin walks into the apartment and sees that Ted has put back all the gifts from his ex-girlfriends]
Ted: I didn't know you were getting rid of the dogs!
Robin: You said you threw all that stuff away!
Future Ted: [v.o.] Kids, this was the worst fight Robin and I ever had. It was one of those fights that last for hours and you start to get woozy and lose track of what you're fighting about. We fought for so long, seasons changed outside the window. Pages of the calendar blew off. It was crazy. But, ultimately, and I couldn't tell you how for the life of me, but somehow we got to here.
Robin: We're really doing this?
Ted: Yeah.
[later, at MacLaren's:]
Ted and Robin: We're moving in together!
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Stuff’ Quotes
Quote from Marshall
[At Barney's play:]
Barney: [singing] The robot found love Confusing my circuitry My software's been hacked Toaster oven You're the one for me Two, three, four.
[Marshall stands up and slaps Barney]
Marshall: That's two.
Quote from Barney
Barney: Moist. Moist. Moist. Moist.
Future Ted: [v.o.] That was the first 40 minutes of Barney's show.
Barney: Moist.
Future Ted: And then we endured about 20 minutes of this.
[Barney shoots a squirt gun at Lily]
Barney: I have to go refill. I'll be back in a moment. Play's not over.
Marshall: I never get picked for audience participation.
Future Ted: And then it just got weird.
Barney: [in a robot costume] Feelings. Inside. Oh, no! [robot noises]
Future Ted: And when that didn't work...
[Barney plays the recorder]
Lily: Okay! Stop! You win. Fine. Barney, I'm sorry I made you come to my show.
Quote from Barney
Barney: I don't take flyers.
Marshall: You took one two seconds before you walked in here.
Barney: That's different. It was for a strip club. Two bucks off wings. How much is your flyer going to save me on wings?
Lily: Fine. It's a flyer from my play.
Barney: Oh, Lily, I'd love to, but we're not in college and I'm not trying to sleep with you. So anyway, this mermaid...
Marshall: Hey, Lily's friend asked her to be in this play, and it's gonna be really good.
Barney: Lily, I love you, but we're too old for this. Asking someone to come see your play is like asking someone for a ride to the airport or to crash on your couch or to help you move. Call a cab, book a room, hire some movers and repeat after me: Friends don't let friends come see their crappy play.