Lily Quote #2
Marshall: I'm sorry, Lily. I'm so sorry. Take us to the hospital.
Cabdriver: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Did you hit her?
Lily: Hit me? Please, this guy could barely even spank me in bed for fun. He's all like, "Oh, honey, did that hurt?" and I'm like, "Come on, let me have it you pansy!" Wow, complete stranger.
Cabdriver: No, no, no, no. It's okay, go on. So these, spankings, you in pajamas or going "au naturelle"?
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Pilot’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Barney: I see what this is about. Have you forgotten what I said to you the night we met?
[flashback:]
Barney: Ted, I'm going to teach you how to live. [off Ted's look] Barney, we met at the urinal.
Ted: Oh, right. Hi.
Barney: Lesson one, lose the goatee. It doesn't look good with your suit.
Ted: I'm not wearing a suit.
Barney: Lesson two, get a suit. Suits are cool. Exhibit A. Lesson three, don't even think about getting married till you're... thirty.
Quote from Barney
Lily: We're coming with you.
Ted: Barney?
Barney: Alright, but under one condition.
[cut to:]
Barney: Look at you, you beautiful bastard, you suited up! This is totally going in my blog!
Quote from Barney
Ted: Okay. Moment of truth. Wish me luck.
Barney: Ted's gonna get it on with a TV reporter. "This just in." Okay... [raises hand for a high-five]