Barney Quote #1847
Quote from Barney in Weekend at Barney's
Barney: Um, a little something called rigor mortis? Oh, come on. Are you really this mad about a book?
Robin: You really think that this is just about a book, Barney? You lied to me. If we're gonna be in a marriage and trust each other, you can't lie to me ever.
Barney: Really? Well, that's just great. Because, in case you haven't noticed these last eight years, lying is what I do best. I'm a magician, Robin. Misdirection and deceit are my stock in trade. You don't want me to lie to you?
Lies are the reason that we're together. Everything single thing I did to get you to say yes to me on that rooftop: Patrice, the false engagement, everything... it was all utter malarkey. But underneath all of those lies is one true thing. One true thing that can support the weight of all the lies in the world, and... and that's the fact that I love you. And you know that when I say that... I am not lying.
Robin: Did you just unhook my bra again?
Barney: Ssh. Ssh. Ssh.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Weekend at Barney's’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Marshall: This is the life. We got the three B's. Beach, booze and bodacious babes.
Ted: I don't know. I'm starting to think we should call the police.
Marshall: Oh, would you relax? We've got it made. One whole week at his bodacious beach house, no strings attached.
Ted: Well, there is one string attached.
Woman: Hi, Barney.
[Ted pulls a string to make Barney's arm wave]
Ted & Marshall: Bodacious.
[Barney jolts up in bed:]
Barney: "Weekend at Barney's!"
Robin: What is it? What's wrong?
Barney: The plays, Robin, the plays. The ingenious techniques I used as a bachelor to pick up busty dullards. They just keep coming to me, I can't turn them off.
Quote from Ted
Ted: Your wedding response card, as promised.
Robin: Why didn't you just mail it like everybody else?
Ted: Oh, see, that's sad, Robin. You should be touched that I hand-delivered it. Has social media so eroded our interpersonal relationships that we no longer wish to experience the...
Robin: You wanted to keep the stamp?
Ted: They're 46 cents now. It's getting out of hand.
Quote from Barney
Robin: Okay, Barney, let me ease your mind, okay?
Barney: All right, here we go.
Robin: Remember when you set your Playbook on fire? That was the moment I realized you were someone I could marry.
Barney: And I'd burn it again if I could. You're right. I'm done with all these plays. Besides, there's no way I'll ever come up with anything that tops "Weekend at Barney's".
[later, Barney jolts up in bed again:]
Barney: "Weekend at Barney's Two!"
Robin: Damn it, Barney!