Barney Quote #1613
[at a strip club:]
Ted: I can't even open her bedroom door anymore. Why do I have to be so sensitive?
Barney: I don't know, bro. Look at me and that Quinn chick. You don't hear me prattling on about how beautiful her smile is, how her hair is like a waterfall of honey-colored silk, how her eyes are like a warm South Sea kissed by the fire and gold of sunrise. I don't even remember what she looks like.
Ted: Dude, you obviously like her.
Barney: Can't you read between the lines, Ted? I obviously like her. How did this happen to me? When did I become such a gooey romantic?
Ted: Look, I think it's healthy that you have real feelings for a woman instead of just seeing her as an object. Switch?
Barney: Sure. [snaps fingers]
Ted: But why Quinn? I mean, you spent one night with her, and she was kind of mean.
Barney: We just connected. Emotionally, intellectually, spiritually.
Ted: So, mind-blowing sex?
Barney: Mind-blowing sex! For an hour afterwards, I couldn't uncross my eyes. Which was awesome, because
when I went back for seconds, it was like having a three-way with twins.
Ted: So... call her.
Barney: I would if I knew how to get in touch with her, but I can't, and it's driving me crazy. Everywhere I look, I see her. I see her walking on the street; I see her shopping in the store; I see her dancing on that pole.
Ted: I see her dancing on that pole, too.
Barney: Oh, my God, that's Quinn.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Karma’ Quotes
Quote from Robin
Robin: "Dear Diary. It is day four on this island, which the natives have dubbed "Long Island," perhaps referencing how each hour here feels like it may never end. So far, they have welcomed me and given me a rare glimpse into their bizarre way of life. By 'entertainment,' they mean table shuffle board, macramé classes, and other non-stimulating activities which are only used in Manhattan to calm down drug addicts and the criminally insane. A preliterate society, their menus display pictures of the food they offer, everyone is forced to sing 'Happy Birthday' four or five times a meal, and dessert has fireworks in it. In their lairs, they often don a primitive shroud called a 'Snugget,' and it is not uncommon for them to go to sleep before 9 p.m., fearing, as they do, the night. Also Diary, I think writing in you is stupid, but you were a gift from Lily, and she's watching me right now."
Quote from Ted
Ted: "Dear Lily and Marshall, I don't know if you know this, but I never took your names off the lease. Well, today I took my name off it. The apartment is now yours. And I think I finally figured out the best thing to do with Robin's old room. See, for me, this place has begun to feel a little haunted. At first, I thought it was haunted by Robin, but now I think it was haunted by me. Well, no ghost is at peace until it finally moves on. I need a change. And I think you do, too. This apartment needs some new life. So, please, make our old home your new home. It is now ghost-free. Love, Ted."
Quote from Robin
Robin: "It's become clear to me, Diary, that I must attempt a dramatic escape. I will fake a stomach ache during dinner. Then, after Marshall and Lily leave for bingo night, I will sneak out the back. I'll swipe Shirley's Rascal and drive to the train station. Shirley's 42, by the way, and rides a Rascal. I swear, it's the second half of Wall-E out here."
[As Robin attempts to sneak out in the dark , the front door is locked. The lights go on and Marshall and Lily are seated at the table. Marshall holds Robin's diary]
Marshall: Bingo... was canceled.