Lily: Oh, what a horrible smell.
Marshall: It reeks!
Cab Driver: Oh, that's just the plant. Don't worry, they shut it down on the weekends.
Lily: Wh- What plant? What are you talking about?
Cab Driver: Don't you know? Baby, this whole neighborhood is downwind of the sewage treatment plant.
Marshall: Wait... What did you just say?
Cab Driver: I said, we're downwind of the sewage treatment plant.
[Titles: "downwind of the sewage treatment plant" -> "DOwnWInd of the SEwage TReatment PLant" -> "dowisetrepla"]
Marshall & Lily: Uh-oh.

Robin: Oh, my God, Lily, have you seen this kitchen?
Lily: I know. It's... Isn't it amazing? I love it so...
Robin: What the hell are you doing? You can't buy this place. Lily, you have a debt of the size of Mount Waddington!
Lily: Waddington?
Robin: It's the tallest mountain in Canada. It's like 4,000 meters high.
Lily: Meters?

Future Ted: [v.o.] Kids, everybody make mistakes. Take this girl Meg for instance. She made a mistake, a mistake named Barney.
Meg: Yeah I thought I was gonna get married to my last boyfriend but, boy, did that guy have commitment issues! That whole relationships, that 3 weeks of my life I'll never get back.
Barney: Well, I love commitment. I wish I could marry commitment.

Marshall: Guys, it's 3:00 in the morning and it reeks in here.
Robin: Ted said it was okay.
Ted: Ah, hey, Marshall. You're still up? Aren't you taking the bar tomorrow?
Future Ted: [v.o.] Discontent was bubbling under this surface, until one day...
[Marshall leaves the kitchen and walks over to Ted on the couch]
Marshall: Ted! How many times have I asked you to put the lid back on the peanut butter jar? It's this sort of inconsiderate, immature jackassery that makes me feel like i'm living in the Real World house, and not the early years when they all had jobs and social consciences. I'm talking about Hawaii and after! I can't take this anymore! Ted, Lily and I are married now! It's time! We're getting our own place!
Lily: Actually, I left the lid open. Sorry baby.

Future Ted: [v.o.] But still, it was time to move forward. So they set out to find a new apartment to rent.
Marshall: Hey, here's one. Private building, recently renovated, hardwood floors, tons of light, two bedroom, 2 bath.
Lily: Oh yeah, but that one's not for rent. It's for sale.
Marshall: Oh, right!
Narrator: Kids, your Uncle Marshall likes to say that he made 3 big mistakes in his life. This was the first...
[Marshall as a kid, jumping from his roof with cardboard wings and ballons]
Future Ted: This was the second...
[Marshall shaves his head just before his weeding to Lily]
Future Ted: And this was the third and biggest.
Marshall: We should buy a place!
Lily: What?
Marshall: Baby, real estate is always a good investment!
Future Ted: It's not!
Marshall: And the market is really hot right now.
Future Ted: It wasn't.
Marshall: And because of my new job, we are in such a strong place financially.
Future Ted: They weren't. 'Cause Lily had a secret.

[flashback to Lily and Robin at a shopaholic support group:]
Lily: Hi, my name is Lily and I'm a shopaholic.
Robin: Hi, Lily. Oh, you guys don't do that here? Sorry. [to Lily] Proceed.
Lily: I buy designer clothes and accessories that I can't afford. I have 15 credit cards and they're all maxed out. And no one outside of this room, not even my husband, knows. And I feel terrible because all I want to do right now is ask you, where you got those shoes? They're adorable.

Marshall: Let's just go take a look at this place.
Lily: Where is it?
Marshall: Uh, it's in a neighborhood called... Dowisetrepla?

Realtor: Dowisetrepla. Oh, I see, you're not New Yorkers.
Marshall: Oh, actually we live on the Upper West side, so...
Realtor: No need to be embarrassed. Listen, here in New York we just shorten the names of all the neighborhood: Soho, Tribeca, Nolita.
Lily: Oh, right. Dowisetrepla! No, I'm from New York. I know this neighborhood. I'm down in the D-town.
Realtor: Oh, well, nobody calls it D-town. Dowistrepla is the up-and-coming neighborhood. And I have to tell you, for these prices you're not going to be able to find an other...
Marshall: I'm- I'm gonna stop you right there. Don't bother with the hard sell. This place is, is way out of our price range, and besides, we've only just started to looking.
Future Ted: [v.o.] Is what Marshall should have said. [rewind]
Marshall: I'm gonna stop you right there. I love it. Let's get it!

Marshall: Thank you guys for coming down here so quickly.
Ted: I've never been to this neighborhood. Kind of thought this part of town was water.
Marshall: No. Dude, this is dowisetrepla.
Ted: Dowisetrepla?
Marshall: Yeah!
Ted: Is that an abbreviation for something?
Marshall: Pfft. [to the realtor] He's from Ohio. [to Ted] Dowisetrepla is the up-and-coming neighborhood.

Robin: Don't let Marshall fall in love with this apartment.
Lily: I know, I know, I know, I know! But what do I tell him?
Robin: I- I don't know, tell him, tell him you saw a ghost. Tell him it's haunted.
Lily: You really don't know Marshall at all.