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Quote from Barney in The Final Page (Part 2)

[When Robin reaches the roof of the World Wide News building, there are candles, lights and flower petals laid around, but nobody in sight. Robin walks over to a piece of paper and picks it up. It's titled "The Robin".]
Barney: [v.o.] The Robin.
[title card: The Robin]
Barney: [v.o.] Step one: admit to yourself that you still have feelings for this girl. [flashback] I am hopelessly, irretrievably in love with her. More than she knows. [v.o.] Step two: choose the completely wrong moment to make a drunken move after hanging out at a strip club and get shot down on purpose. Step three: agree that you two don't work, locking the door on any future you could have together. [flashback] I'm done trying to get you. I can't do it anymore. [v.o.] Which will drive Robin nuts.
Robin: Huh.
Barney: [v.o.] Step four: Robin goes nuts. Step five: find the person who annoys Robin most in the world...
Robin: Nobody asked for your help, Patrice!
Barney: [v.o.] ...and ask for her help.
Patrice: Oh, hi, Barney. What are you doing here?
Barney: Actually, I'm looking for you. This may sound kind of weird, but I have a proposition... [v.o.] Explain everything to Patrice and hope she agrees to help.
Patrice: Yay. I love Robin. Of course I'll help.
Barney: Good, good. [v.o.] Step six: check with your doctor about possible broken ribs. Step seven: pretend to be dating Patrice.
Robin: Nobody asked you here, Patrice!
Barney: Actually, I did.
Barney: [v.o.] Step eight: wait until Robin inevitably breaks into your place to find the Playbook and show it to Patrice, which you'll monitor via the hidden cameras you have in your apartment.
Barney: Patrice, the robin's in the nest. That means Robin broke into my apartment. Were you even listening when I explained the codes?
Barney: [v.o.] Step nine: after Patrice finds the Playbook, have your first big fight. [flashback] This is going so well. Thank you so much.
Patrice: I know, but what the heck are Lily and Ted doing here?
Barney: I don't know. My friends have no boundaries. [groans] How can I ever thank you?
Patrice: Will you watch my cat next weekend?
Barney: No. Come on, we should probably go back inside.
Barney: [v.o.] Step ten: prove your loyalty to Patrice by burning the Playbook, and actually burn it. You don't need it anymore. Step 11: because your friends have no boundaries, they'll inevitably have an intervention for Robin, which you'll monitor via the hidden cameras you have in Marshall and Lily's apartment. Step 12: tell only Ted about your plan to propose to Patrice. [flashback] You can't tell anybody. Agreed? [v.o.] Step 13: wait and see if Ted tells Robin, and if he does...
Ted: Barney's getting engaged.
Barney: [v.o.] ...it means your best bro in the world has let go of Robin and has given you his blessing. Step 14: Robin arrives at her favorite spot in the city and finds the secret final page of the Playbook. The last play you'll ever run. Step 15: Robin realizes she's standing underneath mistletoe.

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