Ted: Okay, so I met this girl on the train, and I texted her, "What's up" She texted, "Hey," exclamation point. Does that mean, "Ask me out" or "Just..."
Lily: Ted, we are responsible for a whole other human life now, so new rule: You can't come to us with any issue unless it's an "8" or higher.
Ted: Got it. So I'm thinking of texting back a winky smiley face.
Marshall: Eight or higher, bro.
Ted: Well, no, what should I--
Marshall: Eight or higher, bro.
Ted: No, yeah, I'm just wondering if--
Marshall: Eight or higher, bro.
Ted: Well, where do you rate this?
Marshall: This is the same as what's in little Marvin's pants right now: A soft two.