Barney: [on his knees] God, if you help me find this sex tape, I am going to make some changes in my life. I am going to stop sleeping around, quit drinking so much, no more shenanigans. I am going to devote my entire life to doing good deeds, and praising your name.
Consuela: Is this what you're looking for, Mr. Barney?
Barney: Never mind, bro. Found it.