Jerry: Barney wasn't interested in my apology. He just wanted me to be cool. And I was so desperate to connect with him. I did something I'm not proud of. I started bragging.
[flashback to Barney and Jerry meeting at MacLaren's:]
Jerry: I bet you didn't know this about me, Barney, but... I've published two nonfiction books about asparagus. And one fiction. [cut] I'm credited with inventing the word "furgling." It means fumbling for keys. [cut] Then all the county fair judges started chanting... "More quiche! More quiche!" [cut] I guess you could call me the LeBron James of drapes.