Quote from Barney in Happily Ever After
Robin: So, who is Becca DeLucci? Barney: Becca is just this girl who lives upstate. I used to visit her now and again. Ted: Mmm-hmm. Where exactly upstate, Barney? Barney: Bedford Hills Federal Penitentiary. And yes, the visits were of a conjugal nature. Lily: No. No way, really? Barney: Really. And what I had with Becca was a perfect relationship. She was only allowed, by law, to call me once a week. If she ever got clingy, the armed guards stopped her. And I never had to pay for dinner. Well, that's not true. I pay taxes. Then again, I guess we all paid for dinner. Thanks a lot, guys.