Marshall: Ted, do you remember in college when Lily did that summer art program in Paris?
Ted: Yeah.
Marshall: Well, she kept talking about this cheesy French guy, Gabriel. So, I went out to visit, and there was this party. And who shows up but Gabriel. And he's got this weak-ass, thin French mustache. I'm not much of a fighter, but I knew I could take this weird little dude. So, I took him aside, and I got all creepy quiet, I got the crazy eyes going, and I said, "You stay away from Lily, or I swear to God I'll eat that mustache right off of your ugly French face." Yeah. Yeah, he literally ran away. I think he was crying. I never told Lily about it. To be honest, I'm not very proud of it. To be even more honest, I am.
Ted: Um, other than confirming a lot of European stereotypes about Americans, did that little story have a point?
Marshall: Yeah, the point is that even though Lily is my soul mate, long distance still almost killed us. If you think that there's any chance that Victoria is your soul mate, you should ask her to stay.