Jill: This is insane. Getting dressed in the backseat of a car. I cannot believe it.
Tim: You look terrific. Look...
Jill: Why are we not there yet? I mean, didn't we get those directions, like, an hour ago?
Tim: No, no. It wasn't that long and we're almost there, honey. We're close. Boy, it's been a long time since you've been undressed in the back of this car.
Jill: Please just keep driving.
Tim: You know, sometimes I forget just how sexy you are.
Jill: Well, keep forgetting. [car swerves] Will you keep your eyes on the road!
Tim: I can't. This storm is getting worse. I can barely see anything.
Jill: Oh, look. There's some lights up there. Just pull up into that place and find out where we are.
Tim: We're in North Adams. I can feel it.
Jill: Oh, just pull in and see.

Jill: I think you're just happy about this.
Tim: Oh, yeah. Thrilled. Look at me. This is how I planned it, man. Drive around three hours. Blizzard. Get lost. End up in Marty's minimart here in Ohio.
Police Officer: You folks own that red station wagon out there?
Tim: Yes, we do.
Police Officer: It's rolling backwards down Elmwood.
Tim: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Randy: Does anybody have any... Karen.
Karen: What?
Randy: Don't cheat.
Karen: Cheating? I wasn't cheating. I was just checking to see if Mark needed some more hot chocolate.
Brad: I'll get some.
Karen: OK.
Randy: Does anybody have any... [Brad stands behind Karen and raises four fingers] fours?
Karen: Darn it! You guys always win.

Brad: Whoa, Dad.
Randy: Who are you? Frosty the Mudman?

Brad: Mom must have been mad when you got lost in Ohio.
Tim: [fake laugh] Oh, she loved it. It was the best night of her life.
Brad & Randy: Yeah, right.
Randy: I guess that's why you didn't come home with your wife. [Tim grabs Randy's head] Over the edge?
Tim: Way over the edge.

Tim: Uncle Bill took her to the wedding. He's gonna drop her off a little later.
Mark: Why didn't you go?
Tim: Go like this? Mudman? I think it's time you guys went to bed. And wash up before you go.
Brad: Look who's talking.
Tim: I heard that.

Tim: Did somebody get the Red Wings game on videotape, like I wanted?
Karen: Oh, yeah, yeah. It was a great game. The Red Wings won, three to two. [Tim drops his head] Guess you didn't wanna hear that, did you? Night.

Tim: This is the best cake Sheila's ever had.
Randy: I'm never getting married.
Tim: You and Sheila have a lot in common.

Jill: So I don't hear any complaints about the honeymoon. You wouldn't do anything to change that?
Tim: Oh, yeah, yeah. After the wedding, you take the bride back to the honeymoon suite, lower the lights, turn on some music...
Jill: Yeah. Yeah.
Tim: play some air hockey.
Jill: Well, I like that.
Tim: OK.
Jill: So, how many games would you be up for?
Tim: How many quarters you got, little lady?
Jill: I got a whole new roll.
Tim: Oh, no.