‘The Look’
Season 5, Episode 7 - Aired November 7, 1995
When Tim buys Pistons season tickets from Bud without consulting Jill, he gets "the look".
Quote from Tim
Jill: I know how important they are to you. So I think I've come up with a really good compromise. How about you keep the tickets for five games, and you sell off the rest?
Tim: Five out of 40? You call that a compromise?
Jill: That's $500. I think that's fair.
Tim: Maybe you don't understand the concept here. These are season tickets, not whenever-your-wife-wants-you-to-go tickets.
Jill: So what are you saying, you're not willing to budge at all on this?
Tim: If I give up my tickets because of my wife, other wives are going to pick up on this. Pretty soon, wives everywhere are gonna be going, [feminine voice] "You know, "The Tool Man" gave up his season tickets. You should too." Attendance starts dropping at stadiums. Next thing we know, it's the end of professional sports worldwide.
Jill: You are just completely unwilling to compromise!
Tim: Yeah. I don't even know the meaning of the word "compromise."
Jill: You don't know the meaning to a lot of words.
Tim: And don't you forget it.
[Jill gives the look to the back of Tim's head]
Quote from Delores
Delores: I want the Knicks on February 21st.
Harry: Oh, I hate the Knicks.
Benny: I'll go with you.
Tim: Oh, sorry, Delores. That's one of my eight.
Delores: I'm from New York, and I want the Knicks.
Tim: Well, tweedle-dee-dee, I'm from Detroit, and I like the Knicks. I bought them. I'm not selling them.
Delores: Oh, really? [gives Tim the look]
Tim: She is good. Really good.
Quote from Tim
Mark: Why can't I get contact lenses?
Jill: I didn't say that you couldn't. I said that we have to check with your father first. That's how our marriage works. We don't make decisions without checking with each other. [to Tim] Hi.
Tim: Well, unless the decision had to be made in under a minute, 'cause if both partners agree on principle... You know, autonomous decisions are not a bad thing between... It's not unusual for a partner to make a decision without... It does happen in a marriage that you can make those... It does... You can... [clears throat]
Jill: Boys, will you excuse us for a moment, please?
Brad: Good luck, Dad.
Randy: Think bonding.
Quote from Al
Al: I hate the look.
Marty: What do you know about the look? You're not even married.
Al: I get the look when I'm snippy to Mother.
Tim: But in your mom's case, the look's actually an improvement.
Quote from Mark
Mark: My contact lens has to be around here somewhere.
Brad: Way to go, Mark. The contact has spent more time on the floor than it has in your eyes.
Tim: Anybody home? Hey, guys.
Boys: Hey, Dad.
Tim: Well... I don't care what you're playing, but I'm in. [drops to the floor]
Randy: It's called "Looking for Mark's Contact."
Tim: How do you play?
Randy: You look for Mark's contact.
Tim: OK. Whose turn?
Brad: OK, Dad. It's yours. OK, one, two three... go!
Mark: Wait, I found it! It was in my eye the whole time.
Tim: Well, if you're gonna cheat...
Quote from Harry
Harry: But I want the Bulls on January 21st.
Delores: January 21st is our anniversary.
Harry: Well, guess where we're going.
Delores: Over my dead body.
Harry: Well, at least for once it'll be nice and quiet in the car.
Quote from Al
Al: Wow! She's speedy with a spatula.
Tim: I don't want to brag, but I'm speedier.
Nick: Is he for real?
Al: It's a question I often ask myself.
Quote from Tim
Jill: OK, Tim. What did you buy and how little do we need it?
Tim: It's no big deal. Bud offered me some Pistons tickets, so I bought them.
Jill: How much were they?
Tim: $50 apiece.
Jill: Well, that's not so bad.
Tim: No, it's not. Here we go.
Jill: How many games?
Tim: All of them.
Jill: What?
Tim: All of them.
Jill: How many games is that?
Tim: Well, more than none and less than 41.
Quote from Tim
Jill: This money is supposed to be for education. For my graduate school, the kids' college fund...
Tim: I'm not going to dip into the college fund. We'll get the money someplace else.
Jill: Where?
Tim: Well, you know, I wouldn't... I wouldn't mind giving up that vacation we had planned.
Jill: Oh, that's big of you. You didn't care about going to New York anyway.
Tim: We don't have to now, 'cause the New York Knicks are coming to town. And the Washington Bullets, the Celtics - the entire Eastern seaboard'll be right here in the Motor City.
[Jill gives Tim the look]
Tim: Don't look at me like that.
Jill: Then put the money back in the bank account.
Tim: Did I explain that, from where these seats are, you can actually reach out, and touch the mascot, Sir... [Jill slams the door] Slam-A-Lot?
Quote from Tim
Tim: Welcome to a special Tool Time on location. I am Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor. And you all know my assistant, Al "La Carte" Borland.
Al: We're here on location to introduce to you another one of our unsung heroes of the job site.
Tim: That's right. Heidi, my unsung heroes theme music, please. [Heidi is chatting to a group of work men] Heidi. Heidi! Guys, back to work, please.
Heidi: Here you go, Tim.
Tim, Al & Heidi: [sing with jingle] He gets no thanks and that ain't right He's the unsung hero of the job site.
Tim: All right, today we're gonna meet the man who drives this great-looking lunch wagon. Hi, there. This is Nick Cantalupo. The man, the melon.
Nick: Thanks, Tim. Uh... Your food service vehicle doesn't get much respect in the culinary community. People call it the "roach coach," the "barf bus," the "upchuck wagon," the "vomit van."
Tim: Well, Nick, you're really whetting my appetite.
Nick: Good. Because today we're serving up some really savory selections.
Tim: Chili and onions, chili cheese dogs, three-cheese chili omelets. [whistles] I think I've died and gone to heaven.
Al: I know what killed ya.