Al: You're having us over for a party when Jill's upstairs sick? Is she okay with that? I mean, that's not very considerate.
Benny: Yeah, you're right. How are we supposed to have a good time if we can't make any noise?
Larry: Yeah, why didn't you call us? We could've all gone over to Harry's.
Tim: No, we couldn't. She wouldn't let me go.
Pete: So because of you, we all have to mime our way through the Super Bowl?
Tim: It's not that bad a deal. Come on. We got lots of good food, we're all together. It'll be a great game. We'll have lots of fun.
Pete: Yeah, but Tim, what about the surround sound you promised us?
Tim: You want real surround sound? Just sit between these two guys after a couple of sausages. Whoo!

Tim: Look what I made for you. Jell-O with extra wobble.
Jill: I'm too woozy for wobbling.
Tim: You just womited, didn't you? This'll help settle your stomach.
Jill: Honey, I can't. I can't eat.
Tim: You gotta eat something. Well, I get credit for trying. If you need anything else, holler.

Jill: Would you give me a backrub?
Tim: A what rub? Hey, I always have time to give my wife a backrub. Hold on a minute. [into intercom] Yo, anybody?
Pete: [over intercom] Yo. Tim.
Tim: Yeah, how much time I got?
Pete: I figure ten seconds.
Tim: Got ya.

Harry: There's nothing on the TV.
Pete: Tim, we need a TV.
Tim: Yeah, yeah...
Harry: Hey, hey, hey, there's gotta be one upstairs.
Larry: Let's go! [the guys dash for the stairs]
Tim: Wait, wait, wait. [they guys stop] I can fix this.
Guys: Right! [they run upstairs]

Tim: [under the covers with Jill] Hi, honey.
Jill: Why are these men in my bedroom?
Tim: They don't want to miss the touchdown.
Jill: Why don't they watch it downstairs?
Tim: Now, that's a funny story...
Jill: I don't want to hear a funny story. You told me that if they came over here, I wouldn't have to see them.
Tim: Can you see them?

Larry: I know. We'll take the TV and set it up downstairs.
Tim: No, you won't take it, come on. She wants to watch the rest of Doctor Lumbago.
Al: "Zhivago." Doctor Zhivago.

Tim: I can work on being more attentive. How's that back?
Jill: It's aching.
Tim: You got a lot of knots back there.
Jill: Yeah. That feels good.
Tim: [answers phone] Hello? I can barely hear you. Hi, Benny. They won? I didn't even see it. That's great. Yeah?
Big Mike's Super Bowl party, huh? Best one you've ever been to, huh? No, I'm staying here. I'm nurturing my wife. I'm real happy. Thanks. Bye. [hangs up]
Jill: Thank you, honey.
Tim: Yeah. Best party ever. I'm real happy.
Jill: Honey, that's too hard!

Tim: [thermometer in mouth] Jill, I think I'm dying.
Jill: [mimics Tim] Tim, I can't understand a word you said. Oh, my God! 99.1? We're gonna have to ice you down!