Tim Quote #2002

Quote from Tim in Eye on Tim

Al: Well, we're gonna be building a mahogany chest like this one.
Tim: Starting out with a hand saw. When a man uses a hand saw instead of a power saw, he can see and feel the relationship between the saw and the wood. See it and feel it. See and feel. [Tim struggles to saw]
Al: I don't see anything happening.
Tim: Well, that's because mahogany is a very, very dense wood.
Al: Ah.
Tim: And the challenge with hand tools is you gotta stick with it. So, Al, please stick with it. While Al is sticking, I'd like to talk about the deeper meaning behind Tool Time What defines the soul of man? Stick with me while we plumb the depths of my own personal gestalt.
Al: Tim, the only thing these people want to see you plumb is a toilet.
Tim: Al, I think you misjudge my audience. I think they wanna go on this very manly journey with me. Right, guys? [a few guys stand up to leave] You guys, sit back down. Next segment, Heidi's doing a vibrating-sander demonstration.

Rate

 ‘Eye on Tim’ Quotes

Quote from Al

Jill: Oh, hi, Al.
Al: Hi. Tim told me you were sick, so I brought you over my very special vaporizer. I've used this ever since I was a little boy to nurse myself back to health.
Jill: That is so sweet.
Al: There you go. Now, the cowboy's arm is the on/off switch. And the steam comes out the horse's mouth.
Jill: Gosh. I don't know whether to say "thank you" or "yippee-ti-yi-yo."
Al: Well, use it every night and you'll be back in the saddle before you know it.
Jill: Thanks, partner.

Quote from Al

Kelly: Tim, fabulous show!
Tim: Thanks. Did you like that metaphor about the current within the man?
Kelly: Oh...
Al: Usually around here the current runs through the man.

Quote from Tim

Al: Tim! Tim, guess who's in the building.
Tim: Well, it's not shaking, so it can't be your mom.