Wilson Quote #244
Quote from Wilson in The Vasectomy One
Wilson: Well, Tim, it's perfectly natural for a man to be proud of his virility. It gives him a sense of power to be able to pass down his genes.
Tim: [grunts] Yeah. I like power in my genes.
Wilson: As a matter of fact, in many cultures, a man is measured by his ability to procreate. In the Zulu tribe of KwaZulu-Natal, the more children a man has, the higher his status.
Tim: Well, I don't want to have any more children. I just like knowing that I can.
Wilson: Hm.
Tim: When Jill first told me she was pregnant, I never felt more like a man.
Wilson: Well, that's perfectly understandable.
Tim: I knew a guy would understand.
Wilson: I also understand there are lots of other things that make you a man.
Tim: Such as?
Wilson: Well, the way you live your life, take care of your kids... your commitment to Jill.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘The Vasectomy One’ Quotes
Quote from Tim
Tim: I thought you were talking about the tube-tying thing.
Jill: Well, I am talking about tube-tying, except it's your tubes.
Tim: You can back up that clip ship right now.
Jill: Honey, it is much safer for a man to get a vasectomy than it is for a woman to have a tubal ligation.
Tim: Says who? The Wives with Knives Club?
Quote from Jill
Tim: A woman? You brought me here to see a woman?
Jill: I didn't know she was a woman. My gynecologist just said that Dr. Kaplan was the best urologist in town.
Tim: How am I supposed to talk to a woman about what's going on in manland?
Jill: Manland? Now you got a theme park between your legs?
Quote from Tim
Jill: Why don't you tell us what's involved in the procedure.
Tim: Yeah, I'm dying to hear this.
Dr. Kaplan: Well, the morning of your appointment, you'll have to shave in the area where I'll be making the incisions.
Tim: Shave? Here?
Dr. Kaplan: It's just a routine procedure.
Tim: Not in my house it's not. What do you think? I wake up, brush my teeth and shave ping and pong?
Jill: Well, you could go to a barber, but it might be a little awkward.