Wilson Quote #79
Quote from Wilson in Dances with Tools
Wilson: Well, Tim, the problem is you're just thinking too much. Let's say you were a racecar driver...
Tim: Oh.
Wilson: And you're taking your turns at Indy.
Tim: Indy, aaaaarrrgghhh! Passing Unser. See you, buddy. Sucker! Aah!
Wilson: Ah, Tim, you're doing quite well.
Tim: Yeah. Finish line's right up there, checkered flag.
Wilson: Don't look in the mirror.
Tim: Aaaaarrrgghhh!
Wilson: Mirrors? Forget about the minicam.
Tim: Minicam's right back here.
Wilson: Don't wave at the...
Tim: Aah!
Wilson: Uh-oh. You hit the wall.
Tim: They're all passing me. I was so close to it.
Wilson: Well, Tim, you were doing fine when you weren't thinking about the minicam or the mirrors and such. You were going on instinct. You were one with the car. You were Zenlike.
Tim: I was Zenlike. I never met Zen. What was he like?
Wilson: No, no, no, Tim. Zen is a state of mind. Like when you dance, you can't worry about what your hands and your feet are doing. You just have to let the music envelop you.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Dances with Tools’ Quotes
Quote from Al
Jerry Holborne: We award this certificate to Tim Taylor for his efforts to promote safety at home and on the job.
Al: You're getting an award for safety?
Tim: Yeah, I am, flannel boy. You got a problem with that?
Al: Well, I guess they didn't see the show where you fell through the roof of the project house.
Tim: Maybe they didn't, Al.
Al: Or the time you glued your head to the table.
Tim: Al!
Al: Or the time when you stapled the...
Tim: Jerry... Jerry, continue.
Jerry Holborne: Your clever staging of realistic-looking accidents clearly shows viewers what not to do. We salute you.
Quote from Jill
Andy: Hey, tool man. I love your show. [grunts]
Tim: [grunts] Oh, yeah.
Andy: You must be Mrs. Arr-arr.
Jill: Well, actually, Arr-arr-arr is my married name. My maiden name was... [high-pitched barking]
Quote from Tim
Randy: Want us to tell you what Mom got you?
Tim: [loudly] No, I don't want you to tell me what Mom got me. The surprise is half the fun. [quietly after Jill goes upstairs] I want to know and I want to know right now.
Randy: Oh, well, you know, I don't want to ruin the surprise.
Tim: Mark, two bucks?
Mark: Broom closet. Top shelf.
Tim: All right.
Randy: Hey, I didn't know there were gonna be bribes involved.
Tim: Where have you been living the last ten years?