Tim Quote #297
Tim: It must've been a great day, watching that first T-Bird roll off that line.
Eddie: Oh, great day. But they were all good days back then. You know, we used to knock out about 100 cars a day. And after work, Hick and me, we'd go down and have a stinky.
Eddie: Yeah, it's a sandwich.
Hick: My own invention - Limburger cheese, sauerkraut, big slice of Bermuda onion, and some hot mustard.
Tim: Why don't you just lick a skunk?
Eddie: And, Tim, they still make a great stinky at... [to camera] down at Big Mike's Tavern at fourth and Jefferson! Hey, that ought to take care of our tab.
Hick: Yeah, right.
Tim: Big Mike's Tavern. Boy, that sounds like a man's bar there.
Hick: You know it, junior. Pool tables, dark wood, American beer.
Eddie: We go there all the time, fourth and Jefferson!
Quote from Wilson
Jill: Do you think that Tim is a good listener?
Wilson: Yes, I think Tim is a very good listener.
Jill: But does he understand everything you say?
Wilson: I think Tim is a very good listener.
Quote from Tim
Tim: Welcome to Tool Time. This is Al over here.
Hick: Oh, we know Al.
Eddie: Oh, we love Al.
Tim: Oh, we all love Al.
Eddie: Hey, Al, come on, give us one of them big salutes. [Al salutes]
Audience: [chants] Al, Al, Al, Al, Al...
Tim: Hey, hey, hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. I don't want to disturb this love fest you have going here, but let me remind you of something: Al is my assistant. He assists me.
Quote from At Sea
Tim: I wanna talk about you and Angela.
Brad: Dad, there's nothing to talk about.
Tim: I want to talk about sex for a minute.
Brad: Dad, I don't want...
Tim: I want you to listen to me, please. Listen up. Sex is, um... It's like a car. The best idea is to keep the car in the garage for a long, long, long time. And then, somewhere in the future, the distant future, when that garage door opens... you gotta think, "car cover".
Quote from Her Cheatin' Mind
Chris: So the only character you liked was the handyman?
Tim: No. I think the hero of this fine novel would have to be the husband. [all laugh]
Chris: He was the quintessential dullard.
Tim: Well, dullard or mallard, I don't care. She was married and only her husband should be allowed near Madame's ovaries.