Tim Quote #3078
Al: Well, let's bring out our first contestant. He is a carpet installer, Wade Waller. [all cheering]
Tim: Thank you. All right. All right, Waller, let's hear you holler.
Wade Waller: One, two, three. [sings and plays guitar] Here's a song about Tool Time It's here now Here's a song about Tool Time And here it is Here's a song about Tool Time Here's a song Here is the... [Tim hits the gong] Tool Time song
Tim: And here's the Tool Time gong.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Adios’ Quotes
Quote from Randy
Tim: We never talked about girls.
Randy: Well, I'm not leaving until Saturday. What do you want to know?
Quote from Wilson
Wilson: Tim, have you ever heard of a play...
Tim: No, no, no. No plays, no ballets, no chamber music. None of that. Just give it to me straight.
Wilson: [chuckles] I'm talking about the Shakespearean comedy As You Like It. Now in this play, the young Rosalind is uncomfortable expressing her feelings for the nobleman Orlando. The only way she can speak her mind is by dressing up as a man, the shepherd Ganymede.
Tim: Okay. What does a cross-dressing sheep lover have to do with me?
Wilson: Well, I suspect, just as Rosalind masqueraded as Ganymede, perhaps you were masquerading as Jill.
Tim: [looks around] Once I tried on a pump. It was Halloween, for God's sake!
Wilson: No, I'm talking about masquerading your feelings. I mean, is Jill really the one who will miss sharing the hot rod with Randy?
Tim: Of course. She's the one... Are you suggesting I stopped him from going because of my feelings?
Wilson: Well, that answer can only come from the masquerader.
Tim: All right, all right. I tried on the pantyhose, too.
Quote from Tim
Tim: But you're gonna be just fine. You're gonna do well.
Randy: You think so?
Tim: Yeah. You've survived every natural disaster known to man... right here in this house.