Tim Quote #2815

Quote from Tim in Tim 'The Landlord' Taylor

Tim: Do you remember that investment property?
Jill: Oh, the house on, uh, Grant or Shadeland?
Tim: Shadeland, right. They came down $2,000. I, um, I think they're ready to sell.
Brad: Do you guys really think it's wise to tie up your money in a rental property?
Jill: The price is right. We're gonna fix it up, rent it out, then...
Jill: Why are we discussing our financial choices with you kids?
Tim: Two kids dressed like a pair of lava lamps.

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 ‘Tim 'The Landlord' Taylor’ Quotes

Quote from Jill

Jill: You know, I've done similar things to him for different reasons.
Al: You have?
Jill: There was this one time, I was really overwhelmed with schoolwork. And he kept pestering me about remodeling a bathroom or something. So, I snuck out to the garage and I... I squirted some motor oil under the engine of his Mustang. It kept him out of my hair for days.
Al: That's brilliant!
Jill: This other time, I painted chicken pox on Mark's face so I wouldn't have to go to a tractor pull.
Al: Oh, this is a side of you I never knew existed!
Jill: Yeah. I'm devious.

Quote from Al

Al: Now... you fix my house.
Tim: Come on, Al. Now, you telling me you wouldn't be ashamed to have someone else repair stuff you could do?
Al: Not in the least.
Tim: You really want me fixing this stuff?
Al: Well, you wouldn't be my first choice. But I'll be right here behind you watching every move you make, "buddy!"

 Tim Taylor Quotes

Quote from At Sea

Tim: I wanna talk about you and Angela.
Brad: Dad, there's nothing to talk about.
Tim: I want to talk about sex for a minute.
Brad: Dad, I don't want...
Tim: I want you to listen to me, please. Listen up. Sex is, um... It's like a car. The best idea is to keep the car in the garage for a long, long, long time. And then, somewhere in the future, the distant future, when that garage door opens... you gotta think, "car cover".

Quote from Her Cheatin' Mind

Chris: So the only character you liked was the handyman?
Tim: No. I think the hero of this fine novel would have to be the husband. [all laugh]
Chris: He was the quintessential dullard.
Tim: Well, dullard or mallard, I don't care. She was married and only her husband should be allowed near Madame's ovaries.