Tim Quote #2653
Quote from Tim in A Night to Dismember
Tim: I am Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor. Welcome to Tool Time. And of course, you all know my assistant, Al Borland. [applause]
Al: Thank you. This year we're kicking off Halloween week with a very special event: Pumpkin racing.
Tim: That's right. On this very ramp, Al and I will be racing our pumpkins in the first annual Tool Time Gourd-O-Rama. Well? We all ready?
Al: I was born ready.
Tim: Interesting. Let's compare our pumpkin-mobiles.
Heidi: Here you are, Tim.
Al: Well, mine first! [audience cheers] Thank you. Well, I built my Borland beauty according to the rules set down by the Pumpkin-Racing Council of Manhattan Beach, California. It runs on independent axles and it is powered entirely by gravity.
Tim: And nobody knows more about gravity than Al.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘A Night to Dismember’ Quotes
Quote from Wilson
Wilson: Well, actually, I'm dressed as a mad scientist for my scene in Mark's movie. You know, he's a very talented director.
Jill: Do you really think so?
Wilson: Uh-huh. He was very clear. He knew exactly what he wanted. I think it's gonna be an excellent movie.
Tim: What's the movie about?
Wilson: I have no idea.
Tim: Neither do we. I just hope it's good and he gets a positive response.
Jill: Yeah. Then maybe he'll come out of his shell and feel more comfortable socially.
Wilson: Well, the teen years are difficult, but we always manage to get through them. You know, when I was Mark's age, my parents thought that I was an odd duck. And look at me now.
Quote from Jill
Tim: Come take a look at some old Tool Times with me, and we'll look at that episode in slow motion. This is a classic library, honey. "Repairing a Gas Heater."
Jill: Or how to blow up a house.
Tim: Yeah. Oh, wow! "Veneering a Table."
Jill: How to glue a board to your head.
Tim: "Suburban House of Horrors"?
Jill: Is that the one where you burned down the garage or filled the basement with sewage?
Quote from Randy
Randy: I thought this was supposed to be a horror film.
Jill: You know, it's just one scene.
Tim: Yeah.
Jill: And for all we know, this may be a piece of cinema history.
Randy: Oh, it's a piece of something.