Tim Quote #2387
Jill: If the show's a big hit in Europe, does that mean we finally get to go there?
Tim: Yeah! We can go to England and visit the Aston Martin factory. Italy, the Ferrari plant. A romantic weekend in Stuttgart at the Porsche factory.
Jill: That's about as romantic as touring a sausage factory.
Tim: We can do that too. On the way home, we'll swing by Poland.
Quote from Wilson
Tim: Wilson, thank you very much for being a guest on today's show.
Wilson: Oh, Tim, it's my pleasure. You know, I have many relatives living in Sweden. They're gonna be so thrilled to see me on TV. Some of them have never seen my face.
Quote from At Sea
Tim: I wanna talk about you and Angela.
Brad: Dad, there's nothing to talk about.
Tim: I want to talk about sex for a minute.
Brad: Dad, I don't want...
Tim: I want you to listen to me, please. Listen up. Sex is, um... It's like a car. The best idea is to keep the car in the garage for a long, long, long time. And then, somewhere in the future, the distant future, when that garage door opens... you gotta think, "car cover".
Quote from Her Cheatin' Mind
Chris: So the only character you liked was the handyman?
Tim: No. I think the hero of this fine novel would have to be the husband. [all laugh]
Chris: He was the quintessential dullard.
Tim: Well, dullard or mallard, I don't care. She was married and only her husband should be allowed near Madame's ovaries.