Tim Quote #1536
Quote from Tim in It's My Party
Tim: Slippery Steve's Snowmobiles. He doesn't generally rent them, but for me he will make an exception.
Jill: It is so great to be married to a man with that kind of power.
Tim: But I must learn to use my power for good, not evil.
Jill: And the good would be?
Tim: How about a snowmobile party for Randy's birthday.
Randy: Dad, I don't know about a snowmobile party.
Tim: Come on, think about it. There's no better way to say happy birthday than saying it at 85 miles an hour, blistering across the tundra, icicles frozen to your face. "I can't see anything!"
Randy: As good as that sounds, I was thinking about having a boy-girl party in the basement.
Tim: Girls love snowmobiles.
Jill: What girls?
Tim: Snowmobile chicks.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘It's My Party’ Quotes
Quote from Wilson
Tim: Wilson, are you naked?
Wilson: No, Tim, I'm wearing a hat.
Tim: Why are you naked?
Wilson: Well, Tim, in Finland, they believe that to rejuvenate the body and the soul, you take a hot sauna bath and you follow that with an ice-cold snow massage.
Tim: What do they follow that up with? A heart attack?
Wilson: No, no, no, Tim. Actually, it's quite invigorating. You know, maybe you'd like to join me for a hot sauna sometime. There's always room for two under my dome.
Tim: No, thanks, Wilson. I'm not much of a "get naked with your neighbor" kind of guy.
Quote from Tim
Marge: Hey, Tim. I see your eyebrows grew back.
Tim: Well, they always do. And they're bushier. They're thicker this time.
Marge: Your wife called and said something about a girl with an injured ankle.
Tim: It's Randy's birthday party and she slipped on the dance floor. Kids.
Marge: Slipped on the dance floor? Let me guess... you overwaxed.
Tim: You know me too well, Marge.
Marge: I should. I see you more often than I see my own husband.
Quote from Wilson
Wilson: Well, maybe you should do something different to participate in Randy's birthday celebration. As the English author Samuel Johnson said: "Our brightest blazes of gladness are commonly kindled by unexpected sparks."
Tim: If anyone knows about unexpected sparks, it'd be me.
Wilson: Well, I think you'd be more fulfilled if you did something for Randy that was both unique and unexpected.
Tim: Like what?
Wilson: If I knew that, it wouldn't be unexpected.
Tim: Wait. But unexpected, you're saying... You know what's really unexpected?
Wilson: What's that?
Tim: The position of that tattoo.
Wilson: Well, Tim, that's no tattoo. I just sat on a live coal.
Tim: Whoo!