Tim Quote #1164
Quote from Tim in Fifth Anniversary
Tim: Now the moment we've all been waiting for - the introduction of the man's kitchen. A guy's galley. I am man, hear me roast. [grunts]
Al: Well, Tim, what do you say we start her up?
Tim: That's right. The only kitchen I know that has an ignition system. [engine starts then stalls] Come on, come on.
Al: Maybe we should get jumper cables, hook it up to another kitchen.
Tim: I think I got it. Listen to that baby purr. [fanfare] Now, let's step inside, take a tour of the man's kitchen. [grunts]
Al: Well, we start first here at men's fine china.
Tim: That's right. 16-ply steel-belted paper plates.
Al: These plates are available in standard black and white walls.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Fifth Anniversary’ Quotes
Quote from Wilson
Tim: Oh, and my neighbor's here up behind them. Wilson, say hi.
Wilson: Festum diem anniversarium tibi, Tim.
Tim: What?
Wilson: That means "Happy anniversary to you" in Latin. You see, Tim, the Ancient Romans...
Tim: No, no. Not now, Wilson, not now. We've got plenty of show to do here, buddy. There's a lot of ways we could celebrate our fifth anniversary. Could've gone to Indy and had some race drivers on. But Al and I decided to do something more from the heart, like the young Chinese boy that smelled his own yogurt. [Wilson shakes his head]
Quote from Al
Tim: We started the show with a very small budget. It was just two guys with a passion for tools.
Al: And one guy who knew how to use them.
Tim: Yeah.
Quote from Tim
Tim: So I went to Binford's headquarters, in the archives, and got our first episode, and I put together a little highlight tape. Ladies and gentlemen, the birth of the tool show.
[Tool Time flashback:]
Mrs. Binford: Does everybody know what time it is? [the few people in the audience are silent until Mrs. Binford points to her apron]
Audience: Tool Time.
Mrs. Binford: That's correct. Binford Tools is happy to present your host Tom Taylor. [plays theme]
Tim: [walks out with a beard] Uh, thank you, Mrs. Binford. It's Tim Taylor. [Mrs. Binford gives him a thumbs up] All right. Well, welcome, audience, to the premiere episode of Tool Time. It's a show that celebrates men and their tools. Before we get to our project today, I'd like to bring out an assistant that we hired for me. We auditioned contractors all through the Detroit area, a lot of professional men, and this is the guy that would work for the money we offered. [chuckles] So, let's bring him out. A contractor, a master plumber and a Pisces - Albert Borland. Come on out, Albert. [a beardless Al walks out] Good to have you here.
Al: Hi.
Tim: OK. It's nice to have you here.
Al: I'm Al Borland, and I'm pleased to make your acquaintance. I'm also very honored to be part of your tool education.
Tim: It's over here, though. You would look into this camera.