Wilson Quote #129

Quote from Wilson in 'Twas the Blight Before Christmas

Tim: You a little confused on the holidays?
Wilson: Hmm?
Tim: Halloween's over. You can put away the witch's broom.
Wilson: Oh, Tim, this is not a witch's broom. This is a julenek.
Tim: A what-a-nek?
Wilson: A julenek. It's a Scandinavian Christmas tradition. Families bind sheaves of grain to a long spruce pole, and that provides nourishment for the sparrows in the winter.
Tim: I wish I could bind up Doc Johnson and twist his little julenek.
Wilson: Well, Tim, that's hardly the Christmas spirit.

Rate

Features in the collection: Christmas Quotes.

‘Christmas Quotes’

Quote from Mark in Yule Better Watch Out

Jill: Actually, honey. I think that those guys at the mall are Santa's helpers, you know. The way that AI is Daddy's helper.
Tim: Right.
Mark: So they do all the work.
Jill: Yeah.
Tim: They assist Santa. Like AI assists me.
Mark: Oh, that makes sense.

Quote from Randy in Yule Better Watch Out

Randy: OK, fine. Here's the truth. There used to be a Santa Claus. But he died six years ago.
Brad: Yep, you just missed out.
Mark: Santa Claus isn't dead.
Randy: Yes, he is. He had a terrible accident with one of his reindeer. Blitzen fell on him.
Mark: He's really dead?
Brad: Kicked the bucket.
Randy: Bought the dirt farm.
Brad: Six feet under.
Randy: Pushing up the daisies.
Brad: Deader than a doornail.
Randy: Stiff as a board.
Brad: Cold as ice.
Randy: Met his maker.

 ‘'Twas the Blight Before Christmas’ Quotes

Quote from Tim

Brad: Dad, it's just one Christmas. I mean, it's not that big a deal.
Tim: Well, it is to your mom and to me and to me. I can't believe you'd be this selfish. Listen to me. Um... In a couple years, you'll be 18. You'll be off to college... or a good trade school. And we won't see you.
Brad: But, Dad, I'll come home.
Tim: Yeah, you'll come home a couple Christmases, but then you'll get married, and I'll never see you. I mean, look at your Mom and me. Your mom's family lives in Texas, mine's in Colorado. We never see our families for holidays. You just don't know how many Christmases we have together, right? I won't be around forever.
Brad: What do you mean?
Tim: Face the facts. You've seen the stunts I pull on Tool Time. I can't keep dodging the bullet.

Quote from Jill

Brad: But, Mom, I don't wanna go another time. It's gonna be great skiing conditions. A lot of kids from school are gonna be there.
Jill: Honey, I can tell this is important to you, but this family is always together at Christmas. Even that year when your father fell down the chimney, we were together. We were in the emergency room, but we were together.

 Wilson Wilson Quotes

Quote from Bye Bye Birdie

Tim: I want Brad to be a good student.
Wilson: Mm-hm.
Tim: So I told him that multiplying compound fractions is a real important part of that. But, you know, between you and me, it's kinda useless information.
Wilson: Well, I don't know about that, Tim. There was a time when I thought my extensive research into ancient tribal cultures, obscure scientific data, the thoughts of great philosophers, would never come in handy. Then you moved in.

Quote from Doctor in the House

Wilson: A Ph.D.?! Tim? Aw, Jill, Jill, Jill, Jill... Do you realize how many hours I had to study to get my doctorate in forgotten languages and extinct cultures? Oh, my, my, my. Sitting in that library, reading that insufferable microfilm till I thought I would practically go blind? Not to mention that to support myself, I had to volunteer as a subject for lab experiments. Oh, oh. And the thing that really irritates me about this whole thing...
Jill: Wilson!
Wilson: Oh, Jill, Jill, talk me down, talk me down.
Jill: I came out here so you'd talk me down.
Wilson: Oh, I'm sorry, Jill. I just lost control.