Tim Quote #489

Quote from Tim in May the Best Man Win

Al: Tim, this could be a little tricky, but once we demolish the kitchen counter in the project house, we'll have about three extra feet...
Tim: Al, Al, which tie do you like better? Red or blue?
Al: Are you listening to me? This is important. Now, I'm saying we got about...
Tim: Why am I my even asking you? You think flannel is hip.

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 ‘May the Best Man Win’ Quotes

Quote from Tim

Tim: Come here. I'm gonna try to work this out, OK? Let's say you got this business. Uh, bubblegum factories. Somebody comes in and tries...
Mark: Do I have cherry bubblegum?
Tim: Oh, yeah, yeah. Probably racks of the best they have. Of course, a lot of that cherry bubblegum. Anyway, so...
Mark: Do I have baseball cards?
Tim: Yeah, you got baseball cards. You've got a little assistant with a little beard. Whatever you want. You got everything. Anyway, so... you got this bubblegum factory - cherry bubblegum and the baseball stuff - and this girl comes in, tries to run things. You know, you've been running it for quite a while and made a big success out of it. But this little red-headed little... you know, little nice little girl, she comes in and takes over. What do you do?
Mark: I tell Mommy.
Tim: But Mommy's not home, is she? [Mark shakes his head] And so the girl takes over your bubblegum factory. You know, it's just the way life is, Mark.

Quote from Jill

Jill: This is so weird, you know. I mean, I get to go to work and everything, but I don't get to be here when you kids get home from school. I keep thinking of that first day that I walked you to kindergarten, Brad. You know, you went up those stairs and turned around waved your little chubby hand and said, [feigns crying] "B'bye, Mommy."
Randy: "B'bye, Mommy."
Jill: Oh, come on. Stop, stop.

 Tim Taylor Quotes

Quote from At Sea

Tim: I wanna talk about you and Angela.
Brad: Dad, there's nothing to talk about.
Tim: I want to talk about sex for a minute.
Brad: Dad, I don't want...
Tim: I want you to listen to me, please. Listen up. Sex is, um... It's like a car. The best idea is to keep the car in the garage for a long, long, long time. And then, somewhere in the future, the distant future, when that garage door opens... you gotta think, "car cover".

Quote from Her Cheatin' Mind

Chris: So the only character you liked was the handyman?
Tim: No. I think the hero of this fine novel would have to be the husband. [all laugh]
Chris: He was the quintessential dullard.
Tim: Well, dullard or mallard, I don't care. She was married and only her husband should be allowed near Madame's ovaries.