Tim: We got into this big argument when I tried to teach her some basic plumbing.
Wilson: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Tim: Just simple stuff, you know: coupling, flange, the trap.
Wilson: Well, Tim. I think the problem might be your metamessage.
Tim: That would be "message" with "meta" on the front of it.
Wilson: Yes, sirree Bob. Two Ms, three Es, two As, two Ss, T and a lonely little G.
Tim: You have an awful lot of spare time, don't you, Wilson?
Wilson: You see, Tim, when men teach women, they tend to use complicated, technical terms to make themselves appear superior. Thus saying to the woman "you are inferior".

Tim: OK, now put the wrench on the coupling at the end of the trap.
Jill: You mean this thing here?
Tim: No, no, no. That connects the elbow to the drain pipe and the flange.
Jill: "Flange"? Who comes up with all these stupid names?
Tim: I'm sorry, honey. It's the little silvery thingy at the bottom, right down in...
Jill: You don't have to be sarcastic, you know. You're using all these technical terms.
Tim: This is practically baby talk.
Jill: Oh, oh, excuse me. I guess I forgot that Mark's first three words were "Mommy", "Daddy" and "flange".

Tim: Well, their excuse is, [high-pitched voice] "Well, you know about this stuff. I don't." "I could break a nail." This is an excuse, women. And you're not the type to have excuses. You need to be taught. And I don't think you're stupid just because you don't know anything. No, that didn't come out right. I don't want to get any cards and letters over that, right, Al?
Al: That's Tim Taylor, care of Tool Time, PO Box 327...
Tim: Al, I think they know the address. Well, this is gonna be different because on next week's show. I've invited a group of women in, and I'm going to teach them basic home repair using a simple language even women can understand.
Al: PO Box 32733...
Tim: No, I didn't mean to give the impression that women are simple. No, that's not what I mean. I mean, it's not a woman's fault that they grew up spending half their time playing with plastic ovens and dolls, and don't know a thing about tools. Right, Al?
[Al holds up a card reading "Tim Taylor, c/o Tool Time, P.O. Box 32733, Detroit, MI 48252-0733"]
Tim: All right, we're going to finish sanding that table now. We've got our belt attached with a rough grip. And we want to plug the thing in now.
Al: Of course, you want to be sure the trigger switch is not locked in the "on" position.
Tim: Any idiot knows that, Al.
[When Tim turns the belt sander on, it shoots across the table. Al once again holds up the Tool Time address card]