Wilson Quote #419

Quote from Wilson in Ploys for Tots

Tim: It's impossible to talk to him. You know, I want to help him, but I'm running out of speeches.
Wilson: Well, you know, Tim, as someone whose first impulse is to speechify, I can promise you that isn't always the best solution.
Tim: I know how to get his attention, an atomic wedgie.
Wilson: Well, you could also try it my way. You know, sometimes, Tim, instead of sharing my wisdom, I try to give people the benefit of my experience.
Tim: What experience of mine would be helpful to Marty?
Wilson: Tim, you have helped raise three terrific kids.
Tim: What good would it be to tell Marty how I raised my kids?
Wilson: Well, don't tell him how you did it, just find a way to show him.

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 ‘Ploys for Tots’ Quotes

Quote from Tim

Tim: I can't even imagine what he's going through, doing all this parenting alone. I mean, without Jill, I couldn't have had the kids.

Quote from Al

Heidi: Welcome to Remodeling Week here on Tool Time. Now, here's the star of the show, Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor!
Tim: Thank you, Heidi. Thank you, everybody. Welcome to Tool Time. I am Tim "The Grateful Tool Man" Taylor, and, of course, you all know my assistant.
[Jazzy music plays as Al walks towards the audience, who are applauding him, and salutes them]
Al: Okay, I'm a perch, I'll bite.
Tim: Well, Tim, it's Remodeling Week.
Al: I know that. Well, I've worn this shirt before, so now I'm re-modeling it. [laughs]

Quote from Tim

Al: Uh, all right. Well, over the years, we've shown you a lot of different ways to upgrade your home.
Tim: But when the job is big enough, it's time to ask for the expertise of a licensed, bonded, professional contractor.
Al: But finding a good contractor can be, well, as difficult as finding a date to the prom.
Tim: Yes, it can, Al. But this time, your mom won't bail you out. "Al, I can't fit in a limousine. Better use a backhoe."