Tim Quote #2721
Quote from Tim in Losing My Religion
Tim: He doesn't want to go to church anymore, and I don't know how to make him.
Mike Webber: Make him go? I've got a teenage son. Can't make a 15-year-old do anything.
Tim: Yeah. That's what I'm afraid of. But if I don't try, then the kid may...
Mike Webber: Wind up on the wrong path?
Tim: Well, it's like he's been cruising along 275 in a great line, then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, he gets off an exit and there he is, on Telegraph.
Mike Webber: Yeah. Potholes, permanent construction.
Tim: I used to race on Telegraph.
Mike Webber: Oh, man, there were some sporting races. I remember one night, some kid took this beautiful Chevelle Super Sport, a '67. And he just corkscrewed off a turn and the idiot wrecked it.
Tim: I was there. I was there, yeah.
Mike Webber: I mean, that was a cherry car. The guy must have built it but he couldn't handle it.
Tim: No, no, no, he could handle it. Look. It wasn't a '69. It was a '68, it was a Nova, and the kid did all... Let's talk about Randy, okay?
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Losing My Religion’ Quotes
Quote from Tim
Tim: You know, there's a place where people get together and pray for God's protection.
Randy: Dad, I'm not going to church.
Tim: I was talking about Tool Time.
Quote from Jill
Jill: So what exactly are you going to be doing at the hospice?
Randy: I'll be spending my time with a woman named Elaine. You know, we'll play cards, watch videos.
Tim: Hey, why don't you take her some old Tool Time videos?
Jill: The woman has suffered enough.
Quote from Tim
Jill: What is this? I mean, you're not exactly Mr. Religious. I mean, half the time in church you fall asleep.
Tim: But I'm in the building, so I get credit.
Jill: [laughs] Is that what this is about?
Tim: That's God's plan.
Jill: God's plan?
Tim: Yes, you go to church, you get credit. You fall asleep, you lose a credit. You understand the sermon, you get extra credit. If you get enough credits, you can bypass hell and upgrade right to heaven.