Tim Quote #2414
Quote from Tim in A Funny Valentine
Tim: Welcome to Tool Time. I am Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor. Of course, you all know my assistant, Al Borland. [crowd applause] Well, welcome to remodeling week here on Tool Time. Today we're gonna show you some space-saving items around the home, like this clever little clap rack.
Al: All right, let's start over here at the kitchen counter.
Tim: No better way to save space than utilize it well. Under-counter recycling bins.
Al: And this narrow area is a great place for a dispenser for aluminum, wax paper and plastic wrap.
Tim: And what about my special drawer?
Al: What is so special about this drawer?
Tim: This is a drawer you can put all the stuff you can't find any other place for. You know, like buttons and pins that don't work, string, thimbles, you know, navel lint, rakes, brooms, skis, poles... There's even room for you in there, Al.
Al: I don't think so, Tim.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘A Funny Valentine’ Quotes
Quote from Al
Al: All right. Now, this is a nifty idea. This is a cooling unit in a drawer. It's great for fruits and vegetables, close to the cutting board.
Tim: As well as your wine, your beer, your vodka.
Al: And that extra liver you're going to need for the transplant.
Quote from Tim
Al: Now, if you need some extra space in the utility room, this unit is a washer/dryer all in one.
Tim: Oh! Finished your laundry, Al. [holds up a large pair of flannel underpants] Oh, gosh darn it, I must've shrunk 'em.
Al: All right. Now, over to the family unit here.
Tim: Now, you can't possibly tell me these are called briefs. How many flannels you have to kill to get underwear this size?
Quote from Tim
Al: Well, this beautiful piece of furniture can fit under a windowsill, and it can house an entire entertainment system.
Tim: Right. In Al's apartment, this is where he hides his square-dance caller. [humming]
Al: It opens through the lid here, and a motorized unit brings the TV up to eye level.
Tim: Right. But the standard motor is just a bit sluggish. So l...
Al: Oh, you didn't soup up a TV counter, did you?
Tim: That way it'll just pop up quicker.
[The TV shoots out of the unit, breaks an overhead duct, and crashes to the ground]