Tim Quote #1972
Tim: You know what happens when a mother babies her son like this? He turns into Al.
Quote from Jill
Mark: And they let us go up in one of those turboprops.
Jill: Ooh! One of those simulator things?
Tim: No. A little plane.
Jill: You took him up in a little plane?
Tim & Mark: Yeah.
Jill: Those things are disasters waiting to happen. They're like Tool Time with wings.
Quote from Wilson
Wilson: Well, Jill, as an experienced pilot, I can assure you that learning with a licensed instructor is quite safe.
Jill: I didn't know you were a pilot.
Wilson: Oh, yes, indeedy. I've logged over a 1,000 hours since I flew spy planes during the war.
Jill: You were a spy?
Jill: Which war?
Wilson: I'm not at liberty to say.
Quote from At Sea
Tim: I wanna talk about you and Angela.
Brad: Dad, there's nothing to talk about.
Tim: I want to talk about sex for a minute.
Brad: Dad, I don't want...
Tim: I want you to listen to me, please. Listen up. Sex is, um... It's like a car. The best idea is to keep the car in the garage for a long, long, long time. And then, somewhere in the future, the distant future, when that garage door opens... you gotta think, "car cover".
Quote from Her Cheatin' Mind
Chris: So the only character you liked was the handyman?
Tim: No. I think the hero of this fine novel would have to be the husband. [all laugh]
Chris: He was the quintessential dullard.
Tim: Well, dullard or mallard, I don't care. She was married and only her husband should be allowed near Madame's ovaries.