Randy Quote #222
Quote from Randy in Advise and Repent
Randy: You think your mom's weird? My mom was driving the car pool, she started singing this weird song- "Do Wah Diddy." Yeah. Must've been from when she was a teenager in the 30s.
Michelle: That's nothing. Remember at the seventh grade dance the chaperone who started doing the Funky Chicken with the principal?
Randy: Oh, man! You got the Funky Chicken mom?
Jill: [sings] There he goes just a-walking down the street Singing do wah diddy diddy dum diddy do
Michelle: Your mom is weirder.
Jill: [sings] Snapping his fingers and shuffling his feet Singing do wah diddy diddy dum diddy do
Randy: Hey, mom.
Jill: [sings] He looked good
Randy: Mom!
Jill: What?
Randy: We're gonna head on over to the mall.
Jill: You want a ride?
Randy: No, thanks. We can "do wah diddy" without one.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Advise and Repent’ Quotes
Quote from Randy
Jill: You know what my problem is?
Tim: No. But I bet we're gonna talk about it.
Jill: I am the kind of person who is so eager to fix things that I don't take my time, and then they just blow up in my face.
Randy: You married the right guy.
Quote from Wilson
Wilson: Well, I'm reminded of a fifth-century Indian book, the Panchatantra, which says, "The first mark of intelligence is not to start things."
Jill: So I shouldn't do anything?
Judith: But the Panchatantra goes on to say, "The second mark of intelligence is to pursue to the end what you have started."
Wilson: Well, actually, Judith, I was just about to finish that quote.
Jill: So I should apologize to them?
Judith: I'm sorry. I thought you'd finished.
Wilson: I was merely pausing for the effect.
Jill: The effect was it seemed like you'd finished, dear.
Wilson: Well, I hadn't, dear.
Jill: You know, um, when couples bicker the way that you're doing right now, sometimes I find that it's useful... [they both stare at Jill] for me to just say bye-bye!
Quote from Jill
Jill: When is Michelle coming over?
Randy: Any minute now.
Tim: Well, I hope her dad gets here quick. Old Bert's going to help me put on the independent suspension on my hot rod.
Jill: Oh, well, that's good, because a dependent suspension can be so needy. [Tim & Brad stare blankly] In my Psychology class that would've gotten a huge laugh.
Tim: And yet here in the kitchen... death.