Tim Quote #1745
Jill: Oh, my God! What have I done? I've ruined two lives.
Tim: Let me think about this. I would guess that in a Psychology class your advice would have been huge. And yet... here in the garage with real people... death.
Quote from Wilson
Wilson: Well, I'm reminded of a fifth-century Indian book, the Panchatantra, which says, "The first mark of intelligence is not to start things."
Jill: So I shouldn't do anything?
Judith: But the Panchatantra goes on to say, "The second mark of intelligence is to pursue to the end what you have started."
Wilson: Well, actually, Judith, I was just about to finish that quote.
Jill: So I should apologize to them?
Judith: I'm sorry. I thought you'd finished.
Wilson: I was merely pausing for the effect.
Jill: The effect was it seemed like you'd finished, dear.
Wilson: Well, I hadn't, dear.
Jill: You know, um, when couples bicker the way that you're doing right now, sometimes I find that it's useful... [they both stare at Jill] for me to just say bye-bye!
Quote from At Sea
Tim: I wanna talk about you and Angela.
Brad: Dad, there's nothing to talk about.
Tim: I want to talk about sex for a minute.
Brad: Dad, I don't want...
Tim: I want you to listen to me, please. Listen up. Sex is, um... It's like a car. The best idea is to keep the car in the garage for a long, long, long time. And then, somewhere in the future, the distant future, when that garage door opens... you gotta think, "car cover".
Quote from Her Cheatin' Mind
Chris: So the only character you liked was the handyman?
Tim: No. I think the hero of this fine novel would have to be the husband. [all laugh]
Chris: He was the quintessential dullard.
Tim: Well, dullard or mallard, I don't care. She was married and only her husband should be allowed near Madame's ovaries.