Jill Quote #450
Quote from Jill in The Great Race II
Tim: Please bear with my wife, this is the first time she's ever been an auctioneer.
Jill: [bangs gavel] I'm gonna open the bidding at one hundred dollars.
Man: One hundred dollars.
Jill: [auctioneer voice] I got a hundred, hundred, hundred... Do I hear a hundred and a quarter, hundred and a quarter, hundred and a quarter?
Woman: Two hundred.
Jill: Two hundred from the lovely lady in the denim shirt. Do I hear three hundred, three hundred, three hundred? Talk to me, talk to me, swing, batter, swing. Come on, people. Stop sitting on your hands. This is big Bob Vila, the man who's the reason why men like my husband have a job.
Man: Seven hundred.
Jill: Woohoo! Seven hundred! [auctioneer voice] Seven hundred, seven hundred, seven hundred, going once, going twice... Sold for seven hundred smackeroonies to the man with the wonderful smile. Hope you're very happy with your tool man.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘The Great Race II’ Quotes
Quote from Wilson
Tim: Well, how would you like it if you were in an auction and some other neighbor behind a fence made 400 more dollars than you?
Wilson: Well, Tim, I'd be hi-de-hurt.
Tim: That's how I felt. I started doubting myself you know? I felt worthless.
Wilson: Well, Tim, it's been said that when a foot compares itself to a yard it always comes up short.
Tim: So you're saying that Vila's the yard, and I'm the foot, and he's better than me, right?
Wilson: Well, only if you perceive him as being better. OK. A philosopher once said, "If you place a small value on yourself, rest assured the world will not raise your price." [chuckles]
Tim: But if I believe in myself I could win this.
Wilson: No, no, no, Tim. If you believe in yourself you've already won.
Quote from Randy
Randy: Good work, Dad. It's so quiet, you can't even tell it's running.
Tim: It's the solenoid, I think.
Jill: Hey, guys. How's it going?
Randy: Dad's taking a ride in the hot rod. Hey, Dad, slow down! Let Mom get in!
Tim: I'm telling you, please pipe down.
Randy: Uh-oh, there's someone on your tail. Is it Bob Vila? No, it's a little kid on a tricycle.
Tim: Would you shut up?
Quote from Tim
Tim: What are you waiting for? Something to explode?
Randy: No.
Tim: You don't want to go for a ride, do you?
Randy: I want to go for a ride. I just want to tell you that your car looks great.
Tim: And?
Randy: And that I think you can beat Bob Vila tomorrow.
Tim: Really? I sure hope so. A great philosopher said once, "If your feet are short, and you don't raise your prices, you're destined for yard sales."