Wilson Quote #144
Quote from Wilson in It Was the Best of Tims, It Was the Worst of Tims
Tim: I think she wants things to be like they were when we first met, you know. But I like the way things are now. I like not always having to impress the other person or get dressed up.
Wilson: Mm-hmm. So you would tend to agree with J.B. Priestley, who said that, "Marriage is like an endless visit in your worst clothes." [chuckles]
Tim: That guy Priestley really knew about marriage.
Wilson: And divorce, too. He was married three times.
Tim: [grunts] Oh, no! Three mother-in-laws. [clucks] You know, when Jill and I first got married, in order win her, I really had to pour on the charm. Then she wanted to see through the charm and see if I really loved her. And now that she knows I really love her, she wants the charm back.
Wilson: Hmm. Well, Tim, maybe after 15 years of marriage, making an effort to be more charming has more meaning.
Tim: Hmm. Yeah. It's too bad. I like being comfortable in my own house. If I've got a little gas, I don't want to have to run out to the backyard.
Wilson: I don't want that, either.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘It Was the Best of Tims, It Was the Worst of Tims’ Quotes
Quote from Tim
Tim: What a great night with the boys, though. A lot of good food... Oh! [unbuttons belt] Ah! Ohh! I got some double-cheese nachos sitting right here. [burps] Ohh!
Jill: Tim!
Tim: Got a little gas ball moving, moving... [burps] Ah!
Jill: This is real attractive.
Tim: So... where were we?
Jill: It's kinda hard to remember.
Tim: This'll refresh your memory. [goes to kiss Jill; stifles burp] Sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry. Mark was right. Ohh. You shouldn't have double onions on those chili dogs. Hello... [vents the bed sheet]
Quote from Tim
Tim: Anyway, being a master plumber, Felix is experienced with all sorts of bathroom problems - sinks, showers... Speaking of showers, what do you think of baby showers?
Felix: Well, I'm against them. I think babies should take baths.
Tim: No, no, it's a different sort of shower. It's like when women get together and yap about what to do when their water breaks.
Felix: With any kind of water breakage, you wanna call a licensed plumber.
Quote from Tim
Tim: Anyway, today we continue our week-long salute... [drain gurgling] to plumbing. And joining us today is master plumber Felix Myman. Let's give him a big Tool Time welcome. Good to have you aboard, Felix.
Felix: Nice to be here, Tim.
Tim: Felix and I go way back, right?
Felix: That's right, Tim. I've been to your house for all of your plumbing disasters. [Tim groans] The water heater, the dishwasher, Jill's bathtub...
Tim: I think we get the point. Anyway, we'll try to get... [Al chuckles on the phone]