Tim Quote #64
Quote from Tim in Wild Kingdom
Tim: You're telling me there's not a snake in this house?
Exterminator: Well, it probably moseyed on back outside. That happens nine times out of ten.
Tim: Nine times out of ten?
Exterminator: Uh-huh.
Jill: What happens the other time?
Exterminator: [chuckles] I tell you, it's funny. Those snakes... Yeah, they pop right up out of the strangest places. Boy, I could write a book. Golly. I've seen them curl up inside of teapots. Oh, there was one time... One time, popped right up out of the toilet. Of course, like I said, that's rare. Besides, you don't have anything to worry about. Judging from that skin your boy found, it's not poisonous. Well, I'll see you folks.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Wild Kingdom’ Quotes
Quote from Wilson
Tim: Wilson, I think I heard a mouse in my basement and Jill got real freaked out about that itty-bitty thing. Can you believe that?
Wilson: Well, fear is perfectly natural. Everybody's afraid of something.
Tim: What about you, Wilson? What are you afraid of?
Wilson: I do have one underlying fear, Tim. I'm afraid that reality as we know it is someone else's dream, and... when the dreamer awakes, I'll no longer exist.
Tim: Wilson, I wouldn't share that with too many people.
Quote from Tim
Tim: OK, guys. Come on down to the basement. The climate control center of our house. Watch what you're doing. [hits head on pipe] I want you guys to meet a friend of mine. The Binford Vulcan-O-Master 5000. A quantum leap ahead of the 4000 model which we replaced this year. This is 150,000 BTU.
Randy: What's a BTU?
Tim: Technical term.
Randy: Yeah, but what's it stand for?
Tim: U is because it's a unit. B is because it's a big, beautiful Binford. That's B. T is heat. Big Heat Unit. That's what this is.
Randy: Dad, heat starts with H.
Tim: Give me that flashlight, will you?
Randy: Dad! Heat starts with H.
Tim: Heat ends with T. Heat. Heat, heat.
Quote from Jill
Mark: What are we gonna make?
Jill: I am going to have the whole Scout troop make their own paper-bag masks.
Mark: Is that all? Billy's mom helped us make a real tepee.
Jill: She did?
Mark: And she made beef jerky from raw meat.
Jill: Billy's mom is a Stepford wife. You're getting pizza and paper-bag masks.