Wilson Quote #9
Tim: Wilson, I think I heard a mouse in my basement and Jill got real freaked out about that itty-bitty thing. Can you believe that?
Wilson: Well, fear is perfectly natural. Everybody's afraid of something.
Tim: What about you, Wilson? What are you afraid of?
Wilson: I do have one underlying fear, Tim. I'm afraid that reality as we know it is someone else's dream, and... when the dreamer awakes, I'll no longer exist.
Tim: Wilson, I wouldn't share that with too many people.
Quote from Tim
Tim: OK, guys. Come on down to the basement. The climate control center of our house. Watch what you're doing. [hits head on pipe] I want you guys to meet a friend of mine. The Binford Vulcan-O-Master 5000. A quantum leap ahead of the 4000 model which we replaced this year. This is 150,000 BTU.
Randy: What's a BTU?
Tim: Technical term.
Randy: Yeah, but what's it stand for?
Tim: U is because it's a unit. B is because it's a big, beautiful Binford. That's B. T is heat. Big Heat Unit. That's what this is.
Randy: Dad, heat starts with H.
Tim: Give me that flashlight, will you?
Randy: Dad! Heat starts with H.
Tim: Heat ends with T. Heat. Heat, heat.
Quote from Jill
Mark: What are we gonna make?
Jill: I am going to have the whole Scout troop make their own paper-bag masks.
Mark: Is that all? Billy's mom helped us make a real tepee.
Jill: She did?
Mark: And she made beef jerky from raw meat.
Jill: Billy's mom is a Stepford wife. You're getting pizza and paper-bag masks.
Quote from Bye Bye Birdie
Tim: I want Brad to be a good student.
Tim: So I told him that multiplying compound fractions is a real important part of that. But, you know, between you and me, it's kinda useless information.
Wilson: Well, I don't know about that, Tim. There was a time when I thought my extensive research into ancient tribal cultures, obscure scientific data, the thoughts of great philosophers, would never come in handy. Then you moved in.
Quote from Doctor in the House
Wilson: A Ph.D.?! Tim? Aw, Jill, Jill, Jill, Jill... Do you realize how many hours I had to study to get my doctorate in forgotten languages and extinct cultures? Oh, my, my, my. Sitting in that library, reading that insufferable microfilm till I thought I would practically go blind? Not to mention that to support myself, I had to volunteer as a subject for lab experiments. Oh, oh. And the thing that really irritates me about this whole thing...
Wilson: Oh, Jill, Jill, talk me down, talk me down.
Jill: I came out here so you'd talk me down.
Wilson: Oh, I'm sorry, Jill. I just lost control.