Jill: So then, Tim spent 20 minutes in the shower and another ten minutes powdering, spraying and clipping. Who did I marry, a man or a poodle?
Delores: You should see Harry in the bathroom. On second thought, nobody should have to see that.

Tim: Hi, Delores.
Delores: What do you want?
Tim: Well, I heard about Dennis wanting to move away. And I came over to talk to Harry about it.
Delores: Let me get this straight. You're taking it upon yourself to fix our family problems?
Tim: Not if you're gonna yell at me.
Delores: Tim, you're a marvelous person. [hugs him]
Tim: No, no...
Delores: Would you like a beer? Some cheese and crackers? Can I glaze you a ham? Oh...

Delores: How could you drop my mother off at the podiatrist and just leave her there?
Harry: I gave her bus fare.
Delores: She just called. She can't even get her shoes on. Go back and pick her up.
Harry: Why can't you do it?
Delores: I'm in the middle of a shift.
Harry: Well, I'm working too.
Delores: Yeah, right. Looks like you're killing yourself.

Tim: Can I get you guys something to drink?
Harry: Yeah. I can use a drink after a day like today.
Jill: Why? What happened?
Harry: I woke up and Delores was next to me.
Delores: Yeah. Well, the view from my side wasn't exactly a Kodak moment.

Jill: So, Delores, does this mean that you have to look for a new job now?
Delores: Yeah. Of course I wouldn't have to if Harry ran the hardware store more efficiently.
Harry: What's wrong with the way I run the hardware store?
Delores: In a nutshell - everything. You let your lazy, bum friends hang out and buy nothing. I should work there.
Harry: I don't want you anywhere near my store.
Delores: I'd whip it in shape and double the profits.

Jill: If Delores wants to work in the hardware store, I see no reason why she shouldn't.
Delores: Thank you for your support, Jill.
Harry: Delores, it'll be a cold day in July before you get anywhere near my hardware store!
Delores: Guess what, Harry. Summer's coming early this year!
Tim: Let's eat!

Benny: Come on, you can do it!
Marty: Yeah, come on.
Tim: You can do it. [chants] Harry!
Tim, Marty & Benny: Harry! Harry! Harry...
Delores: Hey! Hey! Why don't you Neanderthals take the pep rally back to the cave?
Tim: [to Harry] No retreat, no surrender.

Harry: Delores, I want to talk to you!
Delores: Oh, really? What about?
Harry: About you taking a hike. I don't want you working in my hardware store anymore!
Delores: Why? Because your friends don't like it?
Tim: It's not that we don't like it...
Delores: Why are you getting in the middle of our business?
Harry: Because you're in the middle of my business!
Tim: Good point.
Delores: No one asked you.
Tim: Also a good point.

Delores: What do you want?
Tim: I want to talk about Harry.
Delores: Sorry, that's not on the menu. Now, what's it gonna be?
Tim: Come on, ever since you left, Harry's not been himself.
Delores: I'm heartbroken. Now, just order something and leave me a big tip.

Tim: And, Delores, I might have said things that made the situation worse. I hate to see a good marriage go bad.
Delores: What does a good marriage have to do with me and Harry?
Tim: Come on, I know that Harry still loves you. I can tell by the twinkle in your eye that you love him.
Delores: It's pinkeye. You want toast?
Tim: No.