Wilson: You know, if you boys are sneaking over to your party, I'd take a coat. It's awfully chilly out.
Randy: How'd you know we were sneaking out?
Wilson: Well, Randy, I've long been a student of the eastern philosophy of the Sufis, and their teachings have enabled me to obtain a heightened awareness. Plus, I saw you out of the corner of my eye.
Brad: Could you just pretend you didn't see us?
Wilson: I'm afraid not. Your mother gave me very strict instructions. And five bucks an hour.
Brad: Man, why couldn't Mom just let us go to the party? I mean, she's totally screwing up our lives.
Wilson: Well, you boys have to realize that parents make rules to protect you, not to keep you from having a funky good time.
Randy: I think they do it just to torture us.
Wilson: No, no, no, Randy. They do it for a very good reason. They want to instill discipline and responsibility so you can be a fine, upstanding citizen like they are. [phone rings]
Randy: I got it. [answers phone] Hello? Yeah, one sec. It's Mr. Upstanding Citizen. He's in the slammer.