Lorelai: I hope it's something like "Calla Lily Lane." Like a flower, something pretty.
Sookie: Or Charing Cross Road, or Abbey Road. Something classy.

Lorelai: Okay, let's see. Where are we?
Sookie: There. Right there.
Michel: That is the lake, Sookie. If we were there, we would all have drowned. We are at the bottom.
Lorelai: No, I think we're off to the right. Or off to the left. Wait. Where's north?
Sookie: Everything's rotated 90 degrees. This map's completely wackadoodle. I can't find-- Oh.
Michel: Oh, no.
Lorelai: [gasps] Oh, no! Oh, no. Oh, no.

Sookie: White sauce looks like pus.
Lorelai: Go in the kitchen, Sookie.
Sookie: Salsa verde looks like infection.

Rory: It's a purse.
Logan: Not just a purse. It's a Birkin bag.
Rory: I went to school with a guy named Birkin.
Logan: I don't think this is the same Birkin.
Rory: Oh. Well, it's beautiful. I mean, it's snazzy and classy. And, oh, smell it. It's got that new-car smell, except it's not a car. Oh, I love it, Logan. I love it. Thank you so much.
Logan: You're welcome. Sorry, there's not another bag inside the bag inside the bag inside the box inside the bag.

Richard: We don't get many sightings of you young people nowadays, the two of you ensconced back there at the pool house. Rory's so busy. Her life's a total mystery to us. She could be in the CIA for all we know.
Logan: Well, I don't think she's joined the CIA., sir, but I'll check her purse for secret documents.
Richard: So, tell me, Logan, what is going on with Rory? Uh, yours and Rory's life.
Logan: Uh nothing special.
Richard: No? Oh, well, does she have any big plans?
Logan: Plans?
Richard: Yes. I mean, the way that girl keeps to herself, we wouldn't know if she was moving to Peru. Are you two planning on moving to Peru?
Logan: No, we're not.
Richard: Well, if not Peru, then what is on the horizon for Rory?

Lorelai: The Dragonfly is a business. We need a credible street name. So I tell you what we're gonna do, we're keeping third street.
Kirk: Taylor is not gonna like that.
Lorelai: Well, too bad, 'cause that's what we're doing. Decision made. It's not gonna be Crusty Bulge. It's not gonna be an Indian name that no one can pronounce. And it's not gonna be a name that 50,000 other people had that caused mass chaos and death in 1492. Oh, my God. I just realized where all that stuff is from.
Kirk: What? What stuff?
Lorelai: Never mind. Just tell Taylor what I said.

Rory: Logan's very nice. He bought me this terrific gift just completely out of the blue.
Emily: Is that so?
Rory: Totally unexpected. It's called a Birkin bag.
Emily: A Birkin bag? Oh, my God. A Birkin bag.
Rory: You've heard of it?
Emily: Of course. That's a very nice purse.
Rory: Oh, maybe I shouldn't use it.
Emily: Oh, no. A Birkin bag is meant to be used and seen.
Rory: I had no idea.
Emily: Well, well, well, a Birkin bag. A Birkin bag. A Birkin bag for Rory.
Rory: Grandma.
Emily: I'm just saying. Richard never bought me a Birkin bag. Oh, this is exciting!
Rory: I guess it is.
Emily: A Birkin bag. I'm gonna remember this day.

Emily: Oh, don't worry. I used to do this all the time with Lorelai, and the things I found... Once, I opened the bottom drawer to her dresser, and it was chock-full of Tootsie Rolls. Hundreds and hundreds, practically spilling out. What could a girl possibly want with a drawer full of Tootsie Rolls?
Richard: Well, perhaps it was what was under the tootsie rolls, Emily.
Emily: [gasps] Under the tootsie rolls! Oh, my God! I should have looked under the Tootsie Rolls. Oh, that's gonna bother me. God knows what she had in there.

Emily: Snooping without knowing what you were snooping for? Honestly, Richard.
Richard: Let's just go, Emily. Now. And leave that purse.
Emily: I was going to leave the purse, Richard. [scoffs] A 21-year-old girl has a Birkin bag, and a grown woman doesn't.

Kirk: I highly recommend miniature golf, where, coincidentally, I hold the single-round record. The property's got closed-circuit, so you can forget about mulligans.