Lorelai: Oh, my God.
Sookie: What?
Lorelai: It's the title search for the Rachel property. And guess who owns it?
Sookie: Tell me it's not that bastard Donald Trump.

Luke: It just means you're a single business entity. You'll both be officers and shareholders and you'll get to make up a name for your company.
Lorelai: Oh, I'm terrible at coming up with names. When we first bought our house, Rory and I wanted to name it. You know, like Jefferson named his place Monticello but we could only come up with "The Crap Shack".
Luke: Nice.

Lorelai: New cook?
Emily: Yes, Marisella. She's introduced us to some wonderful dishes so charmingly specific to her native country.
Lorelai: What country is she from?
Emily: One of those little ones next to Mexico.
Lorelai: How charmingly specific.

Emily: Just because your own experience sitting for a portrait was bad doesn't mean Rory's has to be.
Rory: What portrait? I haven't seen this.
Lorelai: They never finished.
Emily: Three painters started, and they all three quit.
Rory: Why did they quit?
Emily: She wouldn't stop scowling.
Lorelai: I was going for a Billy Idol thing.
Emily: The one from Italy had some sort of breakdown.
Rory: Oh, my God.
Lorelai: It didn't hurt Van Gogh. The guy should thank me.
Emily: A year later, I swear I saw him rummaging through our recyclables.
Rory: Well, I'm happy to sit. If it's for Grandpa, why not? Wonderful. I'll set it up first thing in the morning.
Lorelai: If you want, I can teach you the Billy Idol. Most people focus on the lip thing, but the eyes are just as important...

Lorelai: It shouldn't be too flashy.
Sookie: How about something historical, like "The Paul Revere"?
Lorelai: Oh, that could work.
Michel: What could work?
Lorelai: We're thinking up names for the inn.
Sookie: If you want simple, something like "The Country Rose".
Lorelai: That's pretty good.
Sookie: We could line the front path with multicolored roses.
Lorelai: Or, or "The Inn by the Hollow". Kind of long.
Sookie: But nice.

Michel: How about "The Money Pit"?
Lorelai: Boo.
Michel: Or "The Outhouse"? Go international.
Sookie: Go back in your hole.
Michel: Or "The Inn Heading for Bankruptcy"? Kind of long, but nice.
Sookie: You who have no dreams, rain on those who do.
Michel: I say this because I care about you. It's risky, what you are doing. Most new businesses go down within two years.
Lorelai: I say if we go down after two years it'll be the most exciting two years of our lives.
Sookie: Same here. Boredom stinks!
Michel: Fine. Proceed blindly. This came in 10 minutes ago. It does not involve The Independence Inn. Therefore, delivering it was beyond my official obligations so I am taking an extra-long lunch break.

Lorelai: Sweet little Fran, the cupcake lady. Not some cigar-chomping, dirty-dealing city slicker.
Sookie: Oh, that's good. Hey, "The Country Slicker". Funny name, cutesy idea.
Lorelai: It's a little much.
Sookie: It's way too much.
Lorelai: I'll call Fran.
Sookie: [gasps] "Fran's Old Place". It'll be like Ruth's Chris Steakhouse. People will be trying to figure out who Fran is. Or "The In Inn" Yeah, it's like an inn that's in with the in-crowd. I'm gonna go sit down.
Lorelai: Do that, sweetie.

Lane: So, Janie Fertman's trying to be my friend again.
Rory: Yikes. So what kind of vibe were you giving her?
Lane: Oh, my patented Keith Richards, circa 1969, don't-mess-with-me vibe with a 1000-yard Asian stare thrown in.
Rory: That should do it.

Rory: Mom, you're not writing what you purchased on the back of these wedding receipts.
Lorelai: Oh, well, just put "cooking spray and sponges".
Rory: Okay. And when an auditor wants to know why you need such large amounts of cooking sprays and sponges?
Lorelai: Then, I drop my pencil, and put the scoop-neck sweater that I'm making a mental note to wear, to good use.
Rory: Well, at least you've got a solid, well thought-out plan.

Lorelai: That's right. You knew Luke as a boy.
Rory: I can't imagine Luke as a boy.
Luke: Can we change the subject?
Mia: He would help people carry groceries home.
Rory: Oh, how very Boy Scouty of you.
Mia: For a quarter a bag.
Lorelai: How very John Birch Society of you.