Lorelai: I melted three entire candy canes into this not-very-large cup of coffee, and still I can barely taste it.
Rory: I know.
Lorelai: It's just the vaguest whisper of peppermint.
Rory: Peppermint.
Lorelai: I swear, I could get the same effect if I put Vaporub on my chest and drank coffee at the same time.
Rory: Peppermint.
Lorelai: I mean, how arbitrary is it to decide to stop serving candy-cane coffee the day after Christmas? Christmas spirit is not something that can be turned off like a faucet on December 26th.
Rory: Yeah, it stinks.
Lorelai: On the plus side, any chest congestion I had is now totally cleared up.

Lorelai: And I got cologne for Michel and the same cologne for my mother.
Rory: Weird.
Lorelai: Well, they'll both hate whatever I give them, so I figured, why spend time picking out doomed gifts?

Lorelai: Well, we have to buy up all the Pluto stuff. It's really gonna be a collector's item.

Zach: No, no, you can still be a person and still be rock 'n' roll. Having babies doesn't mean you can't be rock 'n' roll.
Lane: I don't know.
Zach: Give me a break. Sonic Youth has a kid, and they're still way cool.
Lane: Yeah.
Zach: And Mick Jagger. That cat has like 15 kids, and he still goes out and rocks.
Lane: Yeah, I guess.
Zach: For sure, the man rocks hard, and then he makes another kid.

Lorelai: Ooh. The redcoats are coming! The redcoats are coming! The redcoats are coming!

Lorelai: Oh. Oh, God. Did you pack Big Ben? I still think it was kind of risky.
Rory: What's risky?
Lorelai: You've spent a lot of time across the pond. You might get confused and forget which side of the road to drive on.
Rory: Yes, it was a near escape.

Christopher: So, you made it here okay?
Rory: Yeah.
Christopher: I was thinking... all that time in England, you might forget which side of the road to drive on.
Lorelai: Hey, don't steal my material.
Christopher: What do you mean, your material?
Lorelai: I just made that joke.
Christopher: The drive-on-the-other-side- of-the-road thing? That's my joke. If you just made it, you ripped me off.
Lorelai: I ripped you off?
Rory: Guys.
Lorelai: That's like saying Lenny Bruce rips off Carrot Top or Woody Allen gets his material from what's his name... the guy with the watermelons.

Rory: So, you stopped the snow?
Lorelai: Yeah. I did an anti-snow dance. It was humiliating and arduous, but I had made a promise to my daughter.
Rory: Humiliating?
Lorelai: Two words: coconut bra.

Female Customer: Is it twins? It's got to be twins.
Lane: Is what twins?
Male Customer: Are you...
Lane: Pregnant? You think I'm pregnant? Oh, yeah, because it's not acceptable in this society to be a plus-sized woman who happens to carry her weight in her belly.
Female Customer: So you're not- Oh, gee. Well, I need new glasses. I'm sorry.
Lane: Of course I'm pregnant. Turkey with Swiss.

Lorelai: I stare at the blank page, and I just keep staring and staring. And eventually I have to get up and lubricate my eyeballs. Otherwise, they would fall out of my head, like raisins.