Sookie Quote #244

Quote from Sookie in Always a Godmother, Never a God

Jackson: Sookie, look at the baptism as a bargaining chip. If we give my mother this, then it'll soften the blow when she finds out that we're not having any more children because of the vasectomy.
Sookie: They'll want to stay at the house if we have this baptism. Your whole family.
Jackson: We'll just have to make room.
Sookie: How? The house is barely big enough for us and the kids. I mean, we'll end up sleeping on a leaky air mattress in the kids' room and getting horrible creaks in our neck while your mother blasts her Flatt and Scruggs CD. And your cousins are gonna be picking their teeth with my Rada paring knives.
Jackson: Oh, like your family is so easy! What about the time we had to see your stuttering cousin Odell in the worst production of Nicholas Nickleby known to man?! That was like nine hours of pure hell! And did I get to fake a heart attack during intermission? No.
Sookie: I'm sorry. There is a difference between nine hours and three full days. There's 48 hours plus 24, whatever that is, minus 9 hours. What does that equal? 40, so that's... 8 and 4 and that's 2 and 10 over.
Lorelai: Whoa! Whoa! Sookie, don't do math. You know that hurts your head.

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 ‘Always a Godmother, Never a God’ Quotes

Quote from Lorelai

Lorelai: I'm keeping what I need.
Luke: You need an episode of Magnum P.I. from 1986?
Lorelai: Of course not. That tape is mislabeled. That's a Knots Landing from 1981. All the women are held hostage at gunpoint during Ginger's baby shower. Classic.
Luke: 21 Jump Street Season 1. You do not need this.
Lorelai: I need my Jump Street.
Luke: So buy the DVDs. It'll save you a ton of space.
Lorelai: No, the DVDs won't have the commercials on them. The original commercials, which is half the fun.
Spuds Mackenzie, Clara Peller, "Nothing comes between me and my Calvins." I mean, they don't make them like that anymore.
Luke: You're gonna be one of those weird old people who hoards empty film canisters and laundry measuring scoops.
Lorelai: Uh, gonna be?

Quote from Lorelai

Lorelai: Oh, look at that. America's Castles, the special Florida edition. Seen it five times, keeping it.
Luke: One thing.
Lorelai: Oh, The History of Paper, a documentary by Ted Burns, distant relative of Ken Burns. Oh, seven hours, dull, dull, dull. Keeping it!
Luke: I'm not going up.
Lorelai: Good. Please Don't Eat the Daisies, seasons two and four. I've been looking for this.

 Sookie St. James Quotes

Quote from Luke Can See Her Face

Lorelai: How late can you stay, Sookie?
Sookie: As late as you want. Davey's with his grandparents, and Jackson's sleeping with the zucchini tonight.
Lorelai: What's that, farm jargon?
Sookie: No, he's sleeping with the zucchini.
Lorelai: But what does that mean, sleeping with the zucchini?
Sookie: It means he's sleeping with the zucchini.
Lorelai: Sookie, fill me in here. Where's Jackson?
Sookie: Well, he checked the forecast today, and there's a potential cold front coming in from Canada, and he knows how important the zucchini is for opening day menu, so...
Lorelai: Are you saying that "sleeping with the zucchini" means...
Sookie: He's sleeping with the zucchini.

Quote from The Deer Hunters

Sookie: He said my risotto was fine.
Lorelai: Isn't it?
Sookie: No, it's not fine. Fine is a word you use when someone stops you on the street that you sort of know, but you don't want to talk to. They ask you how you are, and you say "Fine." And that's enough so they don't have to keep talking to you, "cause they don't want to. Then they can feel good because they've been considerate enough to ask and if, God forbid, something actually is wrong they'll actually sit down, take time and listen, even if they don't want to.
Lorelai: Sookie, I don't think he meant fine as a slam or as a monologue.
Sookie: He couldn't have meant it any other way.
Lorelai: Sookie, I hate to see you get so upset over one little review.
Sookie: This is pride, Lorelai. I mean, you know about this risotto. I mean, on my mother's deathbed-
Lorelai: You made the risotto and she lived three more years.
Sookie: She was supposed to be dead. The doctor said she wouldn't live through the night.
Lorelai: And she lived because of the risotto, the magic risotto.
Sookie: And this guy had the nerve to say it was fine.
Lorelai: I don't think he knew the story.