Lorelai Quote #1975

Quote from Lorelai in But I'm a Gilmore!

Lorelai: [on the phone] Rory, two days ago you were on the bathroom floor crying about why he won't call you. Why doesn't he like you, what did you do.
Rory: I was drunk. I was sick.
Lorelai: You, my beautiful, brainy, fabulous daughter, were lying on the floor of the bathroom, wondering what you had done wrong! Which is disturbing to me on several levels, including the fact that I can't remember the last time I cleaned the floor of the bathroom.

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 ‘But I'm a Gilmore!’ Quotes

Quote from Lorelai

Paris: Founder's Day punch?
Kirk: Abba Zabbas.
Lorelai: Good morning, Vietnam. [Paris groans] How's everyone feeling today? Terrific. Okay, I got tacos, hard tacos, I got soft tacos, I got fries, curly, straight, and spicy.
Paris: Are you serious?
Lorelai: Trust me. It's the best hangover food on the East Coast.
Kirk: You get a Mars bar? You know, hair of the dog?
Lorelai: Ah, there's pop tarts in the cabinet, Kirk. Coffee'll be up in a minute, grab some water and start hydrating!
Paris: The smell of these tacos is making me nauseous.
Lorelai: No, no, no. That's the quart of Patty's non-FDA-approved Founder's Day punch you drank last night. Eat a taco.

Quote from Paris

Paris: He got dumped two years ago. Apparently, it was a vicious Julia Roberts to Kiefer Sutherland kind of dump. She broke his heart, slept with his best friend, and took the dog. He swore off women completely until he met me.
Rory: Wow. That was a lot of ground you guys covered last night.
Paris: He finally admitted, once his cough started coming back, that what we have he no longer views as casual. He said we are officially in a committed-
Rory: Hey, I know that word.
Paris: ...relationship, and I would not be remotely out of line if I called myself his girlfriend. And then I handed him the Nyquil, and then he passed out.
Rory: Very romantic.
Paris: I know.

Quote from Michel

Michel: [on the phone] Hold on a second. [to Lorelai] It's for you. It's Sookie. She's done with her doctor's appointment.
Lorelai: Oh, she say how she is?
Michel: Mm, to someone who may have asked her, I'm sure she would have.

 Lorelai Gilmore Quotes

Quote from Let the Games Begin

Emily: What on earth does Frank Lloyd Wright have to do with my salad?
Richard: And your walnuts.
Lorelai: Mrs. Wright apparently had this major problem with her help. She was very rough on them and they totally hated her. So this guy who had worked for her forever, he had finally had enough. I believe the incident was over walnuts, wasn't it, honey?
Rory: The exact cause has not been proven.
Lorelai: Anyhow, Mrs. Wright invites this whole posse of people over for dinner and they're all sitting around eating, and Mr. Disgruntled Servant Guy goes outside and locks all the doors and windows and douses the whole house in gasoline and sets the place on fire.
Emily: My goodness.
Lorelai: So the house is on fire, and people are freaking out, so they run to the doors but the doors are locked, so a few of them try to get out through the windows, but Mr. Angry-Puss is standing outside with an ax hacking them to death and so they all died.
Emily: Why on earth would you tell me that story?
Lorelai: All I'm saying is, sometimes eating a walnut is preferable to getting hacked to death or set on fire during dinner.
Emily: One of these days I'm going to make you eat in your room.

Quote from Richard in Stars Hollow

Lorelai: How about a triple feature? Three Days of the Condor, The Show, and The Jerk.
Rory: Hmm. The Show is, like, 9.5 hours.
Lorelai: But The Jerk is short.
Rory: Hmm.
Lorelai: The three faces of Costner: Bull Durham, Dances with Wolves, The Postman. Tom Petty playing Tom Petty, that great big speech about: "Once upon a time, there was a thing called mail. It'll make you laugh, cry, or mail something."
Rory: Ooh, we could do a Ruth Gordon film festival. Harold and Maude, Rosemary's Baby, and that really great episode of Taxi.
Lorelai: Got it. The worst film festival ever: Cool as Ice, Hudson Hawk, and Electric Boogaloo.
Rory: Sold.
Lorelai: I'll get the Hawk.
Rory: I'll get the Boogaloo.

Quote from The Road Trip to Harvard

Emily: You know what? I'm not returning the gift. I'm going to put it away in a closet and you won't know what it is until you do get married someday.
Lorelai: Tell me now.
Emily: Sorry.
Lorelai: Come on, I may never get married. I may be a free spirit my whole life or I'll fall in love with a separated Catholic guy like Katharine Hepburn did and then not get to go to his funeral when he dies.