Lorelai Quote #1343
Lorelai: Bonjour, Luke. Pouvez-vous attacher vos chaussures?
Lorelai: Uh... Hi, Luke. Do you know how to tie your shoes?
Luke: Very good.
Lorelai: Yeah. It came in handy, let me tell you. Not one shoelace fatality on my watch.
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: It's the perfect gift for Luke. Fine fancy jam from France.
Rory: Fine fancy jam from Jackson's pantry.
Lorelai: I don't know what you're talking about. I am looking right here at this beautiful hand-crafted label and it says "Fruits de la Terre."
Rory: You didn't even spellcheck to make sure you got the French right.
Lorelai: Yes, well, I think it adds an authentic touch. See, in my world, the person who made this jam was an illiterate orphan, Sochelle.
Rory: As in Sochelle Crab.
Lorelai: Yes, exactly. Sochelle was born by the sea, or so said the note left in the bassinet when the nuns found her on the steps of Notre Dame.
Rory: Oh, good, there are nuns.
Lorelai: Every sad story needs nuns. Anyhow, Sochelle had nothing - no father, no mother, no friends, no education. All she had was a burning desire to make great jam, and now she's the most successful jamstress in Paris.
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: In fact, I have here in my hand a schedule of all the activities we are going to partake in over this week, the final week of Rory Gilmore's life before she enters the ivy-covered hallowed halls of Yale University.
Rory: Schedule, please.
Lorelai: Okay. Today we get these presents out to our friends and then we hit the mall.
Rory: Got it.
Lorelai: Tomorrow we get an early start and we hit three of the crappier movies that are out.
Rory: And then we have dinner at Grandma's.
Lorelai: Which I will conveniently not put down on my list in the hopes that that magically goes away. Okay, the next day we hit New York, see your fancy art galleries, hit the Strand.
Lorelai: Pizza at John's. Sunday, pick up all the stuff you need for school, and then there's a barbecue at Sookie's. Monday is mani/pedi, facial, haircut, go to the psychic, and stock up for Tuesday, the day of all days - Godfather I, II, and III, with extra showings of the Sofia death scene over and over as long as the Mallomars hold out.
Rory: The perfect day!
Lorelai: I agree.
Rory: And I think we have just enough of the biscotti that we brought back from Milan to last us the rest of the week.
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: Oh my God, your bed feels good.
Rory: Do not get comfortable. I will sleep on top of you if I have to.
Lorelai: Oh man, smell this.
Lorelai: I forgot that pillows don't have to smell like feet. You know, I have to say, I think it's good I did this hostel thing in my thirties, and I'll tell you why.
Rory: [hugs her clothes] I missed you, I missed you all!
Lorelai: If I had done it in my twenties or teens, I would've been nave enough to think that hostels were exotic and romantic. But once you're in your thirties, you've lived enough to know they're gross and should be avoided at all costs.
Quote from Let the Games Begin
Emily: What on earth does Frank Lloyd Wright have to do with my salad?
Richard: And your walnuts.
Lorelai: Mrs. Wright apparently had this major problem with her help. She was very rough on them and they totally hated her. So this guy who had worked for her forever, he had finally had enough. I believe the incident was over walnuts, wasn't it, honey?
Rory: The exact cause has not been proven.
Lorelai: Anyhow, Mrs. Wright invites this whole posse of people over for dinner and they're all sitting around eating, and Mr. Disgruntled Servant Guy goes outside and locks all the doors and windows and douses the whole house in gasoline and sets the place on fire.
Emily: My goodness.
Lorelai: So the house is on fire, and people are freaking out, so they run to the doors but the doors are locked, so a few of them try to get out through the windows, but Mr. Angry-Puss is standing outside with an ax hacking them to death and so they all died.
Emily: Why on earth would you tell me that story?
Lorelai: All I'm saying is, sometimes eating a walnut is preferable to getting hacked to death or set on fire during dinner.
Emily: One of these days I'm going to make you eat in your room.
Quote from Richard in Stars Hollow
Lorelai: How about a triple feature? Three Days of the Condor, The Show, and The Jerk.
Rory: Hmm. The Show is, like, 9.5 hours.
Lorelai: But The Jerk is short.
Lorelai: The three faces of Costner: Bull Durham, Dances with Wolves, The Postman. Tom Petty playing Tom Petty, that great big speech about: "Once upon a time, there was a thing called mail. It'll make you laugh, cry, or mail something."
Rory: Ooh, we could do a Ruth Gordon film festival. Harold and Maude, Rosemary's Baby, and that really great episode of Taxi.
Lorelai: Got it. The worst film festival ever: Cool as Ice, Hudson Hawk, and Electric Boogaloo.
Lorelai: I'll get the Hawk.
Rory: I'll get the Boogaloo.
Quote from The Road Trip to Harvard
Emily: You know what? I'm not returning the gift. I'm going to put it away in a closet and you won't know what it is until you do get married someday.
Lorelai: Tell me now.
Lorelai: Come on, I may never get married. I may be a free spirit my whole life or I'll fall in love with a separated Catholic guy like Katharine Hepburn did and then not get to go to his funeral when he dies.